Oh,
Twilight Series, it's so easy to analyze and dissect. Really, it is. Despite protests from true fans that the books were never meant to be analyzed and that Stephanie Meyers herself has proclaimed they have no "point" or "message," the books are just begging to be critically analyzed. Whether you agree with that or not, you have to admit, the books (and movies) have some
seriously creepy moments -- and not just average, "well that's
weird" creepy, but horror movie creepy. Keep reading to find out the top three creepiest moments from
Twilight.
1. Edward Cullen watches Bella sleep.
As in, he sneaks into her house and stands above her bed, staring down at her like a full-on creepy creeper, just like in every single dream I've had about a terrifying serial killer. No matter what anyone says to me about this, it isn't romantic, it isn't cute and it isn't part of a great love story. It's straight-up creepy and indicative of a seriously unstable individual if the way they want to see their crush is
defenseless and unaware of their presence. As I read the books (for research, and peer pressure, purposes), this was the moment where I buckled my metaphorical seatbelt and said, "Sista lady, we are in for a
treat with this one" and began flipping through my mental rolodex of literary criticisms.
2. The Wedding Night.It's every girl's dream to wake up from her wedding night bruised and bloodied and with no recollection of what happened, right?
Right?
Um, no, Stephanie Meyers, NO. The justifications I hear for this
creeptacular wedding night are honestly the most ridiculous things I've ever heard and they don't actually counter the assertion that: waking up with no memory of having sex with your new husband, but you're bruised, bloody, and sore isn't romantic or sweet or something you ask for. That's rape.
That is straight up rape. It doesn't matter if she just married him, or if she "wanted it." It's creepy and weird. And while sex can be weird, it shouldn't be that violent and you should have
clear memories of it. The last book of the series bothered me more than any other and really cemented, in my view, the fact that every single man in the book is abusive in one way or another.
Don't even get me started on the fact that Bella effectively wakes up pregnant. Creepy overload.
3. Jacob imprints on a baby.He's climbing in yo' windows, he's snatching yo' babies up. And imprinting on them.
Just writing the phrase "Jacob imprints
on a baby" caused a shiver to run down my spine. Seriously, so creepy. In case you don't know, "imprinting" is a response of shape-shifters when they find their soulmate; they lose all affection and feelings for others and only focus on one another. So, in short, Jacob falls in love with a
baby and somehow it magically falls in love with him because babies totally have those kind of complex feelings. If someone ever looked at my baby and admitted to "imprinting on it," I would call the cops the second they turned their backs. And then Renesmee (oh my dear that name) "ages rapidly," so even though she's only seven, she
totally looks 17, so it's OK! I am so creeped out.
Readers, what do you think? What's the creepiest moment from Twilight for you?
Recommend
Comments (59)
i've never read twilight, but this has amused me greatly
I've read the books, but haven't seen all the movies out. I didn't think the books were anything that great anyway, and yeah, some moments were a little creepy.
i never read the books and watch the movies for laughs.
and this post really made me laugh. :)To be fair, it was made pretty clear that she remembered the sex, Meyer was just trying not to go into detail because these books are written for tween girls, so she kept it vague. Edward does plenty of creepy, unacceptable things to complain about, without having to make things up. He did not rape her. She definitely wanted to have sex (even after being warned repeatedly that it would be dangerous and she could potentially die), especially the second time, she actually begged for it (barf). Now the bruising (there was no blood), that's weird, and maybe takes S&M a little too far, but again, considering she pleaded with Edward for more just a few nights later, it clearly wasn't non-consensual. She made a stupid decision, yes, but it was informed and it was her decision. Edward is a creepy, abusive stalker, but Bella eats it up. The creepiest part about his behavior, imho, is that she actually likes it.
Honestly, if this were my list, I think I would replace the wedding night with the parts of Eclipse where he removes the engine from her truck or has Alice kidnap her to prevent her from seeing Jacob. The fact that she would continue to stay with a man who tries to control her like that is extremely creepy.
he's climbin' in yo windows,
he's snatchin' yo people up, tryin' to rape 'em so ya need to hide yo kids, hide yo wife,
hide yo kids, hide yo wife,
hide yo kids, hide yo wife
and hide yo husband becuz they rapin' e'rrbody out here.You don't have to come and confess
We're looking' for you
we gon find you we gon find you run and tell that homeboyLove the Bed Intruder song reference! Its stuck in my head! :) And the beginning sounds like Edward a bit no?
I think that even creepier than any of this is that Disney cartoon Beauty and the Beast(iality) where the lovely female falls for a creature that is sort of a Dog, a buffalo and a lion all swirled together. Disney couldn't use an animation of just some really ugly, nasty REAL guy that you might see in Walmart because that would gross the female audience out. But show a petite lady falling for what is the equivalent of a buffalo / dog combo special and everyone is like "Awww. How sweet." CREEPY.
But ... I did know a woman who confessed to having fantasies about being ravaged by huge werewolves. So, I guess that I can see why gals might go for the buffalo / dog combo special.
The amusement I got from this post is the first thing Twilight has ever been useful for, imo.
@BinarySearch@xanga - honestly, the beast is more attractive to me than he is once he turns back into the prince. fabio anyone?
I agree with you! Except that she remembered the sex. I just watched the movie and livetweeted it's suckness. It was so much fun. And she definitely remembered the sex.
I loved #1. My fiance and I gave the first movie a shot and when it got to that part he freaked out. To this day, he still criticizes Stephanie Meyer as the "creeper promoting unhealthy teenage relationships." By the time we got to the sparkling, he was done.
I love your point in #3 too (she looks 17 so it's totally ok). Um, I don't know Jacob's age at that part in the book but last time I checked 18 was the legal age for consent...
LMAO. this really made me laugh, very interesting -- ive never read the books but have watched the movies.
This Twilight hate is getting just as old as the Twi-hards! If you don't like the stuff don't fucking watch it or read it. Simple as that god damnit.
People are fucking stupid!
@corporatecrow@xanga - Haha I agree. His real body/face/look just isn't very attractive.
I remember when the first movie came out I used to argue with everyone I knew who would say edward was so romantic mainly with the sneaking in her room and watching her sleep thing. That part over everything else reaaaaallly bugged me. Especially because people's general defenses for that scene were stupid things like "Well he's a vampire so it's ok." Though it's just an exaggeration of Peter Pan peeking on Wendy I guess. Steph is a horrible writer though...
I read the books just to see what all of the hype was about, and lets just say I wasted a few weeks of my life. And now I've seen the first and the 3rd movie, just because one of my friends wants to see it. I'm not going to lie, I was interested in seeing it too, but not for the same reason. And again. a few hours of my life wasted....
When I wake up next to a guy I'm with, sometimes I stare at them while they sleep. I guess I'm creepy...
@Digital_Angel21@xanga - but he was in the room watching her sleep without her knowing!! THAT's creepy, lol.
I definitely thought these were the 3 creepiest moments too lol.
@BinarySearch@xanga - I just finished choking from laughter, your comment is frigging hysterical. I always thought of a buffalo/ lion type thing too. lol
Honestly, the part with Renesmee. He imprints on her, that means that he is whatever she needs at that point in time. So when she is a baby or a little girl he is her protector and her best friend. It is not until she gets older that he will become something else. Although I do agree that the fact that she is actually a little kid but looks and acts 17 (Although mentally and maturity wise she will be as well since she grows in those ways as well just as quickly), is slightly creepy.
If she "straight up wanted it" then it wasn't rape. Just because it was violent doesn't make it a crime. Do you know what rape is?
Yeah, he has some creepy moments. But I don't think he raped her on the wedding night...
No means yes!
I need to ask my boo to watch me sleep. . . every night. That is SUPER hott!
The imprinting on the baby was what really threw me off in the books. I never thought they were much for literary minds, but they were sort of a guilty pleasure until that moment. I liked Jacob because he didn't come off as a pedo. Then he fell in love with baby what's-her-face and it was all downhill for his character from there.
God, get over yourself, lol
1) yeah, it's kinda creepy, I'll give you that
2) Come on! Seriously? she remembered it. she wasn't bloody. it was HER decision. she was not raped.
3) It's not like he is going to make a move or anything. i can't quote it, but I'm pretty sure he said that when you imprint on someone, you's be anything they want you to be. friend, brother, boyfriend, father-figure, anything. it's really not that creepy.
i know right! thank you for saying this.