Tuesday, 17 November 2009

  • I Am a Teen Mom


    I feel this subject should be broached to all teen girls at one point. So I'll get it out of the way: I am a teen mom.

    I was pregnant at the age of 16 (by accident). I had my daughter April-4-2008, when i was 17. I was SCARED. Everyone was scared. My boyfriend and I spent time crying for a long while before we became ok with the "we can do this" idea. I did take responsibility for my actions. I am raising a gorgeous daughter but at a cost from my own future.

    Please don't get me wrong, I would not change my life for anything in the world. But before you think. "oh I want a baby!", think of what you are giving up at an early age.

    I had to drop out of high school my junior year, For me to go to college, I have to get my GED, which never looks great on a resume. I wanted to be a chef or a work at a zoo. I wanted to go to a good college. I wanted to be able to go party and have my fun as a teen. I wanted to be able to go out and do what i wanted all night, i wanted to get a job. I have so many broken dreams . I would never go back and change a thing. But please, teens, before you think about having a baby, think of what you are giving up and decide if you're ok with that. It takes a HUGE toll on your life and changes it forever.

    A child is a blessing, and if you're not ready for the responsibility...please don't! I hate hearing about babies in the news that get abused from frustration of the mother or father. TAKE A CHILD SERIOUSLY! It's a lot of work!

    What do you think about having kids when you're a teen?

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Comments (751)

  • openmindedgirlk@xanga

    I love kids but I'm not ready to have one. If it would have happend then I would try be the best mother I could for my kid. I know lots of ppl who had kids young and I think as long as ur good to ur baby it dosen't matter. Age is no sure fact that ur going to be a good parent.
  • shoujo@xanga

    It all depends on the individual... but when we're talking about teens as a group, the majority of teens are not ready for motherhood. Thus, they shouldn't be having sex if they aren't ready to accept what might happen. I'm glad that you were able to take responsibility for your actions rather than abort or put it up for adoption. You've given up a lot -- but you were mature about it. Yes, maybe your previous dreams are broken... but that doesn't mean your life is over. :)
  • Gorrific@xanga

    I got pregnant at sixteen as well.  After lots of talking, my fiance and I opted for an abortion.  We didn't have the finances or the maturity.  We didn't want our mistake to become a burden on our families, forcing them to help us care for it.
    I hate when people say (I know you didn't, but I'm just saying) that having an abortion isn't taking responsibility for your mistake.  In some situations, it's the most responsible thing you can do.
    I also think most pregnant teens should consider this option closely.  When you're a teenager, you mostly likely don't have a job, or you have a crappy one that will not support a family.  You will either need help from the government or your parents.  Is it fair to be a burden on your family and society?  You're also probably not emotionally ready as a teenager.  You're still just a kid yourself.

    Probably going to get flamed for this with "JUST PUT IT UP FOR ADOPTION" posts, but honestly, abortion is a fair option.
  • stuipdthing

    I'm 19 and in college now and if I got pregnant I would definitely get an abortion. I say this now but I feel like the decision would be a lot harder and I'd want to keep it if I had it. So I wrote down the abortion thing down somewhere so I don't forget incase that happens. I wouldn't consider abortion because the abortion system is so over crowded to begin with and the nine months of pregnancy...my parents were really abusive when I was a child and if they found out now, I'd completely be kicked out of my family. And they would find out, there's no way they couldn't so I just couldn't go through ti


    if you're a teen mother and you can take care of a baby I say by all means go ahead. But I don't understand teens that have a baby because they want one 
  • vanishingx@xanga

    I give you major props for keeping the child and taking responsibility :) One of my friends actually had a baby girl yesterday (she's 17) and another friend of mine is due next month. I don't support teen pregnancy, but it happens and always will, and more people need to speak out like you did to prevent it.
  • actualization@xanga

    For most people, yourself included, pregnancy's not a decision - it's an accident. I think that teens need better sex education to prevent accidental pregnancy.

    I commend you for taking responsibility. Congrats and good luck!
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    I think its a bad idea obviously but its not the end of the world. Life goes on.
  • krn_gurl_92@xanga

    Finally. Someone who doesn't pass it by as if it's an every day-normal thing. I see 12 year old girls that go around telling people that they want to have children because they're cute. Where do they get these ideas?
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    @actualization@xanga - sorry, sex is not an accident. if you fuck someone and get pregnant you know why. We all know how fucking and babies work.
  • live_for_love@xanga

    @Gorrific@xanga - Amen! I've never had to make this decision myself, but I agree with you 100%. 
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    @Gorrific@xanga - eww baby killer.
  • live_for_love@xanga

    @ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - I'm gonna go out on a limb and say she's talking more about educating teens on different forms of birth control during sex ed and such. But I could be wrong. 
  • stuipdthing

    @Gorrific@xanga - Hey before you get any anti-abortion comments I want to say I commend you, it couldn't have been an easy choice to make. I feel like it's the most responsible option in many ways too. 
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    @openmindedgirlk@xanga - @shoujo@xanga - i agree
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    @live_for_love@xanga - yeah. I think so too. but chicks that get pregnant and have sex... you seriously can't tell me most of them didnt know what sex was or that they couldnt get pregnant, you know?
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    @stuipdthing - yeah killing an unborn baby for her own convenience. How responsible. Idiot.
  • live_for_love@xanga

    @ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - True, true
  • whitetrashpoet@xanga

    @Gorrific@xanga - Thank you for saying that. Sometimes, girls who choose to have abortions ARE doing the most responsible thing. I respect your choice. I have never been pregnant, but honestly? I'm married and financially independent and the thought of it still scares the shit out of me (though I want kids!), I can't even imagine dealing with that as a teenager. I can't imagine how hard that would be.

    Kudos to you, though. I have a lot of respect for teenagers who decide to keep and raise their children.
    Also, I'm glad you pointed out the harsh reality. Many girls seem to think they can still do all those things they planned on doing, just leave the baby with grandma. And that's not being a mother. You do need to make sacrifices, but as you've said...you're rewarded in ways you can't believe. Congrats on your baby girl!

  • StylishMudd@xanga

    Very good post. My boyfriend and i should be more careful :T i had to take the morning after pill 4 times in the past 2 months..
  • sarah@dollarish

    I'm not sure I ever want to have children. They're such a huge responsibility, I don't think I'll ever be ready.
  • KelseaPhobia@xanga

    I've always wanted to have a kid when I'm young, just so I can be close to my kids and understand everything they're going through better, but I definitely don't plan on having one when I'm still a teen. If I end up pregnant while I'm still young, I don't know what I would do.. I would probably put it up for adoption or ask someone in my family to take care of it.... I can't even imagine how hard that must be.

    I know a girl, she just a year older than me or so, and she's pregnant. She's 21 weeks. And I can't help but think everything in her life is going to fall apart.. her boyfriend left her and her family situation isn't the best and I'm scared for her and her baby.
  • Gorrific@xanga

    @ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - A fetus is not a baby.  Think about what it means if you personify that clump of cells.

    Miscarriage = Manslaughter
    Driving = Endangerment
    Woman = Stripped of her rights

    Look up PersonhoodUSA.  You'll be surprised.

    And I honestly can't take you very seriously when you make immature comments like "ew, baby killer" it just shows your own ignorance.  Which is not the same as stupidity.  It's just rather unfortunate.
  • actualization@xanga

    @ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - I said pregnancy is an accident, not sex. That's why I said sex ed is important.
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    @actualization@xanga - I don't really see how pregnancy can be an accident. When you have sex you know you can get pregnant.
  • ShimmerBodyCream@xanga

    @Gorrific@xanga - A fetus is an unborn baby, that you killed. Ew.

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