Earlier this year, I had the luck and the privilege to live in the Campbell Club, one of the co-ops in the college town where I currently live. It’s a BIG house, and I really really enjoyed my time there. And even though I had to leave because of unforeseen circumstances, I learned some very valuable life lessons from living in a big house with 25 other people. And 8 cats. And a giant metal spider sculpture.
1. You Have To Pick Your Battles
I won’t lie to you, Lovelies: Some of my roommates at the co-op really got on my nerves. Like the stoned guy who entered my room without permission. Or the person who stole my super-special veggie patty sandwich (I did not lose it, for the hundredth time!). But sharing a space with so many people, even a space as big as the Club, depended on not sweating the small stuff. This didn’t mean being a pushover — I spoke my mind when it came to things like people being late for their chore shifts. But I had to learn how to save my freakouts for when it really mattered. If nothing else, people will take you more seriously when you do speak your mind.
2. Cleanliness Is Next To Godliness (And Frickin’ Decency)
Co-ops have a particularly bad reputation for not being very clean. It makes sense; Pile a lot of busy (or not busy) people into a big house and there are sure to be some hygiene issues. Add in animals, and it can get gross very fast. It made me realize that keeping a clean environment isn’t just good for health and appearance: It’s also a sign of respect for yourself. Granted, I’m a little paranoid in terms of germs. And there were kids in the co-op who had backpacked across countries and other awesome-but-kinda-grungy activities, and hence didn’t mind the less-than-perfectly-hygienic conditions. It’s really the idea that counts. Whenever I mopped the floor or washed out a dish, it was my way of saying to the world, “I respect who I am and where I live. And I don’t want to have any of my roommates or their animals become sick or be injured by living in an unsafe environment.”
3. It’s All About Communication.
Biggest cliche in the world, I know. But this is the biggest lesson I took away from the Campbell Club, because the members went to such great lengths to make sure communication between the members was cohesive. People went out of their way to not hurt other people’s feelings. The house had special workers that were solely there for resolving disputes between members. It was a utopian living situation in that way, and it made the house a very pleasant place to live. And it made me wish that all communal places in life required you to go out of your way to be decent to other people…
4. Caring is More Important Than Appearance.
Second-biggest cliche. But think of it this way: Would you rather have a good-looking, well-spoken person who never did their chores live with you, or the barefoot girl who runs down the stairs in a frenzy because the granola she made for everyone might be burning in the oven? Would you rather live with the buff athlete who knows when all the coolest bands are coming to town, or the skinny guy with the weird outfit who spent six hours weeding the front yard so that you could plant carrots? Seems obvious to me.
5. Life Is Easier If You’re Friendly.
There’s a whole lot of cynical people out there who would disagree with this. But it’s true: Making an effort to be nice to people really does pay off. Maybe not in the short term, but definitely in the long term. It’s the kind people who the co-op members remembered, and who were welcomed back when they needed a place to crash for a few days. Mutual kindness leads to a better environment in which to be a team. And that’s exactly what a co-op family is: A team. A team of hippies, freaks, and people who like to have a good time in a weirdly painted house.
Have you ever lived in a co-op or any other cooperative living setup? What have you learned from the roommates in your past? Let us know!
guest
It sounds fun! =] I lived in a dorm & that pretty much sucked but I did like the community of it all. Like when I broke my wrist & had an awkward cast so I continuously had to go to my friend’s door & ask her with a sad face to open a jar for me.
Definitely a good sense of family.
guest
Our dorm in college was more
guest
This sounds like my own nightmare, ha. I’ve lived with friends before (max of four to a house, or eight to a dorm floor) but that’s my limit. I need my own personal space and I just don’t feel you have that living in a big group. Also, the noise would be a big problem for me.
guest
After having 2 different roommates in college, and 2 floors filled with crazy people, followed by 5 different roommates, I currently live by myself. Screw roommates!
guest
i did communal living last month for 3 weeks. i got into a situation where i needed a place to stay for just that short time, so i was looking and saw they were into holistic things (good sign to me). I went there and fell in love. definately an amazing experience, something new always happening, and for sure a growing experience. im the type who does like my space, but everything they do is so loving its like the space isnt even necessary. i did take a couple hours at night to chill or watch a movie, but i just remember how fun it was.
i think when you live with loving/binding people it doesn’t matter as much
guest
I don’t think I could ever live with that many people. I might go insane.
I live by myself now and I couldn’t be happier. =]
orchid / 123 posts
@Thatslifekid@xanga - More what? I’m sorry, it didn’t go through.
guest
@WriterBrit - was more like a co-op than a dorm from the sounds of things.
orchid / 123 posts
@Thatslifekid@xanga - That’s kinda cool! Did you all have a communal kitchen?
guest
@WriterBrit - On the floor we did, We also had dining facilities but most often we’d go down and buy pieces/parts of a meal and bring it upstairs and cook together.
orchid / 123 posts
@Thatslifekid@xanga - Oh man, add in dumpster diving and you’ve got a co-op mentality.
guest
@WriterBrit - Lol, we all entertained one another as well. Dancing, singing, games…
orchid / 123 posts
@Thatslifekid@xanga - Yup, that sounds like a co-op! Always someone with a guitar on the front porch…
guest
they let you keep pets in your dorm/club house? damn. i love puppies, but i wouldn’t want them pissing outside my door.
guest
I’d probably lose my mind. I can do those kinds of living set-ups for maybe a week or two, but I’d never submit myself to more than that. I will only clean up after myself and one other person. I’ve been in a situation where I lived in a room with 3 other girls and I would get annoyed about cleaning up after anyone. I also get super pissed about food and such. Never an issue when I lived in dorms until I studied abroad and the kitchen was communal instead of shared between myself and a few because I guess they could get away with it. Oh and when I stayed in a hostel for a weekend with friends. Someone staying in the hostel took my wine coolers even though I labeled them.
Basically, I suck at number 1 haha.