I've always been a pretty good kid, but with a curiosity for the strange. I've never done any drugs and I'm not going to, but I still find the facts about this newish drug eerily interesting: Bath salts. I remember about a year ago people were stuck in the confusing limbo between the name and the actual product — "Are they actually bath salts?" Not at all. So, what are bath salts really like? Terrifying, apparently. Take a look.


So first of all, "bath salts" are actually a drug called mephedrone. It's a synthetic stimulant, and the name "bath salts" is just so they can sell it sort of legally. The high is described as anywhere from cocaine to meth, but like any other man-made high, it's hardly operating by some kind of formula regulations. I've stumbled upon some interesting testimonials that I think really speak for themselves, so here are some reasons I know at least Iwill never come anywhere near this stuff.


1. Obligatory: Zombie attacks. It's now surfaced in Louisiana on top of the Florida attack news that part of the erratic behavior that can happen as a side effect of the drug is, you know, thinking a person is food. Combined with super-strength from the wicked adrenaline rush, you've got a cocktail to get yourself shot. No bueno.

2. Super-cool hallucinations combined with paranoia. And by super-cool I mean super, duper-uncool. This quote puts it in perspective:

Walking back across the hall, a sudden wave of panic hit me. I was unable to bring myself to go into my room. Instead I sat down outside. I was told afterward that I sat there for around five hours. I had no idea of the time, but I do remember various things. I heard voices from my friend's room, which I strained to hear but couldn't quite make out. I convinced myself that they had been hiding in the wardrobe, and I wasn't invited. I started having auditory hallucinations, hearing the sound of wings flapping behind my head and high pitched voices. I was convinced they were watching me from the keyhole in the door. I learned later there were, in fact, no keyholes in the doors at all.

That's no way to spend a Saturday.

3. The loss of all dignity at the hands of a synthetic substance. You know, I read "Twelve Moments In The Life Of The Artist" by David Sedaris a long while ago, and that made a meth addiction sound hilarious, but he has a certain turn of phrase. I think what it really looked like was probably something like this, a quote from a bath salts addict:

Every white speck I see, anywhere, I'm licking it, tasting it, hoping it's more. I've been the same way on cocaine but not for long usually. I was scraping the powder that had caked up inside the straws and piling it up and re-sniffing. Anywhere that bag of 'bath-salts' had touched, I could swear I could see little traces of white powder, I was licking everywhere, CD cases, my Ipod case (which I used to snort most of it from), my bedsheets, my fingers, I licked every possible thing I could think of where any residue could be. My dresser, the crumbs from my pockets were licked clean, I couldn't get on this computer and put anything together because of the 'White Specks' I saw everywhere. I would stick my fingers up my nose and if anything had crusted up there, it went in my mouth. 10pm and I'm still wide awake, been awake the entire previous night. In many places, I saw dust and powder and lines that weren't really there. I'm sure saw it though, or I thought I did. I looked down at my shirt to see if I got any powder on my clothes, I'm licking my shirt.... yeah.

Cool, sign me up for that.

4. Alienating your loved ones, and permanent psychological damage. Pretty much any serious addiction has the power to do this, but the way bath salts are being talked about — as a semi-harmless party drug — needs to be reevaluated. Here's one guy's thoughts on that:

My friend (who has since refused to speak to me) called an ambulance when she found me in my room, huddled on the floor. I was rushed to the emergency room. I had a 140 bpm (normal resting being 55) and was seizing. By this this I was seeing hallucinations of monsters, aliens, demons….

So why am I sharing this story? To date, I have kidney failure from the extended MDPV usage. I have recently been diagnosed with heart problems and have been prescribed beta blockers to slow down my heart rate. To top it off, I developed acute schizophrenia/bipolar disorder that I will never recover from. I am lucky to be alive.

5. Because it sounds like pretty much every bad thing any drug has to offer packed into one. Check out this testimonial about how this "experienced drug user" won't ever touch the stuff again:

DO NOT USE THIS STUFF. MY HEART STOPPED BEATING. It literally stopped. I am an experienced drug user who has experimented with more drugs than I have fingers. This is more dangerous than crack. Not to mention the come down was the worst experience of my life. It lasted 9 hours. Nothing but fear, heart palpitations, jitters, severe nausea, and everything coming and going a million miles an hour. It was terrible. Because of this experience I will never use drugs ever again. I am lucky to still have a living human body to use to warn you with. STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM THIS SH*T.

So what I'm hearing is: hallucinations like LSD, except they're almost all bad. No Roger Sterling moments here, folks. Then there's the paranoia that comes along with a lot of highs. There's the adrenaline rush you might associate with cocaine or another stimulant like meth I guess, that can make you have super strength and maybe give you a heart attack. Not everybody thinks their body is a temple, but nobody deserves that.

Like I said, I have no interest in drugs for recreational purposes, but my own morbid curiosity gets the best of me in cases like these. I hope no more people die at the hands of this wacky drug, but I know that's probably wishing for too much. I thought this final thought from the original article was pretty poignant:

Long story short:
  • -1-2 hours of euphoria,
  • -20+ hours of insanity,
  • -3+ Days of comedown,
  • -And I'll maybe never return to 100%

It's not worth it.

What are your thoughts on the recent surge of this dangerous drug?

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