Battleship, y’all. Upon first word of the board game reboot getting the greenlight, I enjoyed a rather hearty guffaw. Upon stumbling on the trailer, I wondered why, oh, why they were making yet anotherTransformers movie. I didn’t play Battleship much, but the trailer isn’t what I pictured if the game leapt to life. If the other announced board game adaptations (Ouija, Candyland, Monopoly, etc.) follow suit and don’t match up to familiar childhood memories, at least consider my quasi-pitches for these hot commodities: 

1. Mouse Trap


Don’t even bother with a script! Leave this movie completely in the hands of the CGI masters. The diving man is already a shoe in for Best Actor.

2. Splat

Remember squishing play-dough bugs? Parker Posey is a crazy baker/chemist who creates a toxic batch of bug-shaped marzipans goodies. The evil candies spring to life and she must kill off the infestation before her bakery/lab becomes a giant sugary blob. Her love interest is an entomologist and is therefore torn between the love of his life and the study of a brilliant new insect species.

3. Connect Four

Still shaping a plotline, but this movie screams colorblind Russians with perfect ponytails.

4. Operation

Will Ferrell, Will Ferrell, a thousand times Will Ferrell!

Would you see any of these movies?  Which boards games would you like to see on the silver screen?