Lovelyish

OMG how awful is that :,(

This is  very sad and tragic. I bet if anyone asks one of those friends she was chatting with why they didn’t do anything, they would say they thought someone else was going to do it. It’s called the Bystander effect. No one does anything because they think the next person will.

Years and years ago a woman was killed outside her apartment in New York while tons of people from her apartment watched. No one called the police. They all thought that someone else had already done so or was going to, so they did not.

WTF

Freaks. All of them.

Social loafing to the extreme. 

I would’ve called the police. 

So.. this makes how many FB related deaths this year?

Not even sure what to say.  

So…her boyfriend wasn’t celebrating it with her so she killed herself? That is almost the weirdest part about this article…

I can’t say I’m surprised…  Humans have always been fascinated by death (anyone remember learning about the gladiators in Rome?), especially with the popularity of social media.  I mean has everyone really forgotten about the Bill Nye incident?

I would understand if the people in this situation were younger.. but she was 31? Her friends should have known what to do. If we were talking about pre-teens, I would understand that maybe the didn’t know what to do in that situation. These were adults. They could have saved her life and it’s a shame they did nothing.

What the actual fuck.

Although this sounds completely wtf I think the fact that her boyfriend wasn’t around for her birthday was the last trigger and definitely not the total reason. You don’t just suddenly kill yourself. That kind of depression takes time to develop and no one in her life took it seriously. 

Although it sounds like a very awful situation, and the friends should have called, but it also sounds like the girl was really unstable (more reason why someone should step in). Her bf couldn’t celebrate her birthday with her so she takes her own life? Perhaps her friends a) either didn’t take her seriously b) have heard it before since she does sound really emotionally stable c) didn’t know what to do or d) actually didn’t care. But to save some of my faith in humanity, i hope its a-c.

I think perhaps they just didn’t take her seriously. I mean, you don’t just kill yourself because your boyfriend isn’t with you for your birthday – she obviously had a lot going on and she was obviously mentally unstable. I’m not trying to support her friends, but we all have someone who is constantly complaining about things and maybe they just got fed up with her talking about it and never believed it would actually happen.

I mean, come on, who documents their suicide with photos on Facebook? It just seems like a massive cry for a attention which they were probably fed up with. That’s going to fuck people up for a long time.

Geez.

This story is all kinds of wrong.

I am sure they are kicking themselves and blaming each other. Except themselves.:(

That’s ridiculous! And her friends didn’t even do anything?????

…And she’s really dead? With facebook, you always have to wonder how real and serious people are. I would have been wondering if she was serious. If she’s killing herself simply because her bf couldn’t show up, I’d wonder if she were serious or just having a momentary lapse of depression. I would have tried to talk her out of it myself, but I don’t even know if I’d call the police unless I truly understood how serious she was. People always realize the seriousness a bit too late, it seems. :/ How sad. I just don’t understand.

Attention seeker. She pushed herself too far and ended up dead. 

Wow. That’s very distressing to hear, why didn’t anyone call the police or even if they didn’t want to call go over to where she lived? was it because they thought it was a hoax or something? And also if she was posting this updates on fb she wanted someone to stop her which no one did. I think that’s terrible that she had to die like that because she felt sad or whatever from her bf not celebrating her birthday…someone ..one of those “friends” could have come over and threw her a little party or at least stopped by and said happy birthday. 

@maybmaybnot@xanga - Like @JupitersDays@xanga pointed out, this is a psychological phenomenon that has been well documented over and over again. So you might think that you would actually do something, but then when the time actually comes you might very well succumb to this. Plus, if you aren’t in a situation where you are around people you are comfortable with you might feel too self-conscious to want to do anything. It’s definitely terrible when things like this happen – the best way to prevent this is to 1) know about the Bystander Effect and understand its influence on people, 2) if you are the person in need of help then specifically specify someone by name or description (“hey you with the blue hat!”) and tell them that you need some assistance. Like others have mentioned, she wasn’t stable and clearly had other things going on and this just was the final straw I guess. To be honest, I agree with everyone else who mentioned that they would have thought it was a joke or a hoax, because it just seems so out of the ordinary. I’d like to think that if I’d seen this that maybe I’d have actually called the cops or gone over to her place or something. But I have no idea if I would, even though I am totally aware of this effect and know what one is supposed to do to help prevent these things.

@Starry_eyed_gypsy@xanga - The what incident? What? 

It is always possible that this person has “cried wolf” one too many times and her friends just didn’t react because it was common, however this ONE time happened to be the time she was being honest.

OR maybe not, I of course can’t say for sure either way, it was just a thought..

@Starry_eyed_gypsy@xanga - What’s the Bill Nye incident? :O 

The Science guy? o.O I’m confused…

This kind of reminds me of the ”Ripper, Hardcore” thing.  How sad.

BTW. (I’m a police caller.)

I wouldn’t have called the police unless it was someone I knew very well. I don’t want to get involved. It’s not my problem.

awful so sad

Natural selection. If you’re mentally unwell, seek help. You do not do a series of “final words” on a public site, and you do not half-entrust/hope that others will somehow come to your aid. Whether they should have is a matter of basic human empathy and morals, but that is still another matter altogether. A needless death by all means, yes, but still – 21st century example of natural selection.

@Adrenaline_Unknown@xanga - I pity people like you. Hope life will be good to you with that attitude. 

hahahahaha so funny (in a sad way)

I don’t know enough about Taiwan, but if that happened in China (barring the fact that Facebook is banned), the public wouldn’t bat an eye.

@JupitersDays@xanga - You’re talking about the Kitty Genovese case. Just saying, there have been a lot of inaccuracies revealed about the original case and the news story that went with it that definitely let her 38 or so neighbors off the hook. The fact that they were all elderly, that calling the police back then wasn’t just “911″ but a 10-digit local number, and the fact that they all lived near a very popular bar where a lot of screaming went on every night are some of these inaccuracies.

http://www.onthemedia.org/2009/mar/27/the-witnesses-that-didnt/transcript/
https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.psych.lancs.ac.uk%2Fpeople%2Fuploads%2FMarkLevine20070604T095238.pdf

I have a ‘friend’ on facebook who’s posted status’ saying she was going to kill herself, only to post another status an hr or two later. She’s posted pics of herself cutting and such. To be honest, i probably wouldnt have called the cops either because it’s such an obvious cry for attention that you dont think the person is actually going to go through with it.

yeah people are fucking shitheads.

check out these whores bryce allen finger and virginia g. gomez
they are 2 filthy cuntface pigs who only care about getting fucked.

Who is dumb enough to believe in such nonsense? It’s so obviously just hear say BS. People might kill themself when depressed or in despair but her last comments are not from such a person “Even while I’m dying, I still want FB (Facebook). Must be FB poison. Haha.”. It’s so faked. It’s not the truth just because it’s in a newspaper. Jeezez – you people are naive. 

I doubt they believed she was actually doing it. I am sure they assumed it was an ploy to get attention (specifically from her boyfriend).

If somebody wants to kill themselves, there is little anybody can do to stop them.  That being said, if this is true, it’s sad she didn’t seek the help she needed.

Being committed under the Baker Act sucks. If you think someone is bluffing or attention seeking, that’s no reason not to do something. Call the police. I guarantee you that after 72 hours in a mental hospital, they’ll appreciate the outside world a bit more (and hair conditioner…oh how I missed hair conditioner in there).

Yet another lovelyish post that’s just too stupid to believe. I wish I had the time to go investigate this. Oh, wait, no I don’t.

@ashleynicole - @misslei11@xanga - He was speaking at a university and when he collapsed no one went to help him, they all tweeted about it instead.

sounds like something a teenager would do *erhm* no pun intended I just thought well nah I’ll leave it as that before I get trolled >.<

I don’t care whatever people say here there is no excuse for this. EVERYONE has heard at one point in their life that suicidal threats should be taken seriously.
I am certain I would have called the cops…even if I would’t have been certain if it was a hoax because you can NEVER BE CERTAIN. Either to help her, or to teach her a leson (in case it would have been a prank).

@Starry_eyed_gypsy@xanga - Wow, never heard of that! It’s possible that many of them were unsure if it was real though, and even if some did think it was real then I can understand the hesitancy to do anything: hundreds of eyes turning on you when you make the choice to call for help, and what would then happen if it turned out to be a hoax? And if you look around the room and see that everyone has a neutral or confused look on their faces, it would tell you how to react, so that could also be why they didn’t call for help. Maybe this is something that needs to be included in educational systems from a young age (since not all parents would know about this), so that kids know how to approach someone or something that looks to be needing help and to not feel uncomfortable about it just because everyone else is walking by without caring.

@PocketfulOfDreams@xanga - But… you CAN’T be sure. That’s the point. I’ve always thought that I’d be there to help people since I’m a very helpful person, but there are situations where I am totally unsure if something needs help or not and don’t react. And there are times when I know that someone needs help but don’t approach. One example was a few years ago at a bus stop terminal. There were maybe up to a dozen of us there and a young girl was sitting on some stairs and this guy was yelling at her so violently, like it actually scared ME. But I didn’t do anything because a) I was too freaked out, b) I didn’t know if anyone else was going to do something and c) I didn’t want to put myself in danger if I did do something. The bystander effect is a very real thing, and unless you are well educated in it there’s a good chance that you’re reactions would go against what you assume you’d do in situations like that. I’m aware of the effect and yet there are still times when I see someone whom I’d like to go up to and ask if they need help or if they are okay but don’t do anything because I am uncertain if they really need help and am weary of what others around me will think. If you are alone with the person, it’s likely you’d help, but the more people there are the less likely you are to do anything.

@ashleynicole yeah saying I’m 100% certain is a little exaggerated I guess. But I am personally pretty sure I would- in a case like that I mean. I went as far as collecting two xangans personal information even though they wanted to stay private because I was so afraid for them. (ahem it isn’t MY problem if they link thinks on the internet so that I can find them). I’ve heard about stories like that too often. I am also too tired of suicidal threats being used loosely. Of course people should not be told to not express what they feel… but I feel like sometimes people need to go into themselves for a few secods to think about what they say. I mean you can say “I almost feel like killing myself” instead of “I am going to take a handful of sleeping pills”.I think many people wouldn’t do it because they think the person who “pranked” them could get angry. I think there are two possibilities: 1.) the person has at least severe problems and could use some help and 2.) they don’t and were trying to have fun, and I hopefully spoiled it (or I get the chance t call them out on it). I don’t have objections to stepping in.

As for situations where I could bring myself into danger, I honestly have no clue what I would do. I was in a similiar as you once..I saw a drunken mother scold her little kid for nothing and I really didn’t know what she was going to do. there were other people too, and the truth I didn’t want to come off as a patronizing bitch in front of them. ( A shameful reason, I know). I told myself that in the end she just yelled and didn’t touch her, and that the mother had problems too and I shouldn’t try to rip a family apart. Plus I honestly had no clue WHAT to do.

That I made mistakes doesn’t mean there should be any EXCUSE though. It is important to figure out what leads people to not do something, but if we just say “well she came off like an attention seeker” “it came across like a hoax” it sounds as if thanks to this explanation it was perfectly fine. It’s not what you wanted to say, but I think people often think that way; making “nature” a self fulfilling prophecy.  It’s obviously not ok because she’s dead.  I think increasing social pressure on actually taking action can make people take action too. That’s why I’m being judgemental I guess. It might have come across arrogant, but I didn’t really want to make that link to what I would have done in the sense of me being so much better-it’s just what I’m sure I would have done, personally. All I’m trying to say is ”don’t make excuses, always do something, it is the right thing.”

Having someone call or rely on you while they’re trying to commit suicide is a hard situation to be in.  I don’t judge these women because I’ve been in their shoes with at least three different people.  Did the women even know where she lived?

Maybe they didn’t think she was being serious? It sounds really lighthearted and joke-y to me.

This is the most depressing thing I’ve ever heard.