Lovelyish

I stop the friendship, life’s too short for negative people.

At some point in life, everyone decided that quality of friends is more important than quantity of friends.

I don’t really have any friends that bring me down, but that’s because I’ve always had the philosophy that it’s better to have 2 really good friends than 15 sort-of-friends.  Sometimes I feel like a loser since I have very few friends, but then I remember that the ones I have are great and that a lot of people have surface-only friends that wouldn’t actually do anything for them when push comes to shove.

I agree with Erika_Steele, I think as you get older your expectations from friends change and decide that it is more important to have a few great friends instead of knowing as many people as you can.  Yes, I do try to surround myself with people who want me to be the best version of me possible, who are supportive, encouraging yet honest.  Also, I find that as you get older, your tolerance for your friends’ BS drops, which basically means it is time to drop those “friends.”

Not anymore I don’t. Too old for that drama and negativity. Trying to reduce wrinkles at this point. lol.

I have frenemies too but the only reason I’m hanging out with them is that I’m stuck with them for some reason. Normally I don’t keep people I don’t like or don’t like me around me. I don’t need them to waste my time nor patience.

Used to. Then I got rid of all of them as nicely as I could. Haha.

I don’t have any friends at all. However, the people who bring negativity into my life are the ones I try to avoid at all costs.

@ash - I’m trying to understand what your wrote, but I don’t get it . 

I have one particular friend who tends to bring people down, not intentionally. He’s just so blunt and says what’s on his mind that he doesn’t have a filter and that’s made him lose a few friends. He has a good heart, he just doesn’t say things in a way people are used to. I’ve been his friend for 6 years and I’ve become accustomed to it, but when I feel he’s going a little too fat, I make sure I put him on check so we balance our friendship out lol.

@ash -
If I’m understanding what you wrote properly, my whole life has been the same way. All my friends my whole life have been pretty toxic. But what do I do? Go through my whole life without friends?

The fact is I’m really socially awkward and terrible at making friends, and people just don’t really like me. I can’t understand why, maybe I try so hard to make people like me after spending years of being alone that people think I’m weird.
So, I currently kind of have firends. They’re mostly far away. My worst, most negative, toxic friend recently cut it off with me. I’ve wanted to end it with her for a long time, but everyone else thinks she’s the bee’s knees even though she’s a terrible person. And her twin sister just had a baby, and I couldn’t imagine never seeing her again.
But now she’s deleted me off facebook and is telling everyone how terrible of a person I am. I don’t even know what to do. It’s kind of hard to think back to being friends with her for so long and now she’s gone, everything’s done. But in the long run it will be for the best.
I can’t understand how she can act like this though, it blows my mind how she’s 21 years old and still acts like she’s 13.

my room mate.

I’ve never had a frenemy, but I have had a friend who would always have some crisis in her life that she would come running to me about, ask for my advice (which she would never take) then continue bitching about how her life was shit when did nothing to change her situation. She would turn up unannouced to my house and wake me up and she threatened suicide about 5 times, which she never went through with.

Once I found out she was making stuff up, I had had enough and just cut off ties with her. I spent years worrying about her, trying to help her, listening to all her problems that may or may not have existed. And having to talk her out of suicide all the time was a pain in the arse, because I didn’t think she would go through with it, but you never really know.

So while she wasn’t a particularly bad person and she never meant to irritate, she would always say something, or bring up her problems to cast a dark shadow over other people. I am understanding of problems, and I am there for friends through bad times. But constantly talking about problems, making up problems for attention and then doing nothing to help yourself, it’s draining for everyone around you.

“Now I only surround myself with people who make me want to be a better mother, wife, daughter, sister, and friend.”

I found this an interesting conclusion; and i love it. honestly i clicked over expecting to find something about “people who validate me even when i’m making the worst imaginable choices” type of post. I think that a lot of people keep toxic relationships because they may not even realize how toxic they are. i’ve seen people’s character change, and not for the better, because of friendships they have had that they don’t want to give up because of how the people, or group of people make them feel. it’s actually rather sad. 

I think we all probably had this kind of person in our life…at one point.

Like everyone else has said, it’s not worth the effort to try to have a relationship with someone who wants nothing more than to see you fail.

Yes… sadly I had to do that and they were people very dear to me but for one reason or another they were not doing any good to me. It was then I learned that some friends walk with you in like a certain distance, then others come along and join you in the journey. It is hard to let go sometimes, but it is highly rewarded.

i just try not to let the negative vibes get to me.