I have a friend who is close with her ex’ new girlfriend and I find that odd. What do you lovelies think? Is that weird, or is it okay to be friends with an ex’ new girl?
I totally did it once. I was in high school, and I was the new girlfriend. I haven’t always had the easiest time making real girlfriends, and to be honest we had a lot in common. It’s sort of like when that guy sees something in both of you, he’s kind of profiling you to be compatible friends, if he’s dating you based on personality anyway. It sounds twisted, and there were times when their comfort level with one another crossed lines with me — she once came out in a towel at her house and just sat and talked to us for a long time, once asked me if I agreed with my ex that her boobs were uneven, etc. — so there was definitely a little bit of competition in the beginning, but after I broke it off with the dude (three years later) she and I stayed friends. We’re still on great terms. Friendships can be a totally different connection than a romantic relationship, and girls have such a tough time finding real friends that sometimes a dude in common is a small thing to overcome.
Coming from the other side of it, though, like had I been the ex, I think I would have had trouble. For some reason I didn’t mind having her around because, well, he had broken up with her to date me (we were 16, I know it’s a mess), but I historically rarely stay friends with an ex much less make an excuse to hang out with him and his new lady, so I can’t see myself doing it the other way around. There’s definitely a delicacy with which it would need to be handled, but is there anything wrong with it? As long as she’s not trying to win him back, and the friendship is sincere, I don’t see anything wrong with it.
What do you think, lovelies? Is it objectively OK to befriend an ex’s new boo? Could you ever see yourself doing that?
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