“I think we should just be friends.” Doesn’t just reading that phrase make you want to punch something? It’s one of those expressions that when coming out of a relationship, we just don’t want to hear. Followed closely by, “it’s not you, it’s me.” And while it may make you want to inflict violence on your soon-to-be ex, is being friends after a break up really that bad? Last year showed us that some of our most favored celebrity couples weren’t invincible, but 2012 suggests to us that just because they broke up, not all love was lost. While the romantic relationship may have ended, the relationship as friends not only lasted, but in a lot of these cases seem to be going strong. Which begs the question, could and should you be friends with an ex?
For Courteney Cox and David Arquette the answer is an undoubted, yes. While the pair split at the end of last year, the two have maintained not only a professional relationship, but their friendship as well. Courteney recently told People magazine, “He’s my best friend. No matter what happens in our future, he’s my very best friend.” While maybe not the most common end result, there’s clearly some logic behind it.
In most cases, when it comes to a relationship, either you were friends first and somewhere along the way it became more, or that you met someone and developed such a bond that they became one of your best friends. Friendship is always part of the romance equation, but when things don’t equal out the way you want them to, does that mean the friendship should end too?
Part of the problem is that it’s often hard to make the transition back from what currently is, to what was, or what could still be — it can be hard to turn those feelings off. At the end of the day, you’re always going to have that history with the person — but at a certain point, history shouldn’t matter, it’s whether you can see a future. Can you see yourself being friends with this person again or is it better to just not have them in your life anymore?
Now, obviously it could depend on what it was that ended your relationship, as to whether or not the friends card can still be played. If the person was unfaithful, or maybe you cheated, it could make holding onto a friendship a little difficult. But for those relationships that just lose their spark and die out, then what? What happens when the infamous “I hope we can still be friends” line gets thrown out there? Should it be scoffed or laughed at, or seriously considered?
So let’s hear it. Would you be friends with an ex? Are their different levels of friendship you can have? Are you for or against it?