It turns out, those ill-fitting, weird looking PajamaJeans for women were the least of the fashion world’s problems. 

Because they now exist for men. OK, they’re not by PajamaJeans, which is a trademarked brand name. They’re a knock-off created by a company called the Lakeside Collection that releases what sounds like AirMall-esque catalogues. They’re the ones behind these tragic abominations to the male wardrobe. 

PajamaJeans for women were bad. But for men, they’re even worse. For whatever reason, someone thought it was cool to include a fake box peek on these pajama jeans. And patches. And on another pair, fake rips and tears. What? Where am I — Crazyland? In what universe, does that make sense? Lounging around the house, I definitely want my boyfriend’s PJs to be dyed to feature patches and tears. Because we’re just a hard couple. (We’re totally not.) 

More than anything else that’s terrifying, these pajama-jean swamp monsters are sold out. I wish I was kidding and that I had made that up. Enough people, out in the world, thought these PJs would make a great gift for the dude in their life — be it their boyfriend, husband, son, brother, whatever — and bought them. All of them. 

I’m all for dressing comfy. But I’m also for dressing for occasions. I’m the type of girl that wears nice dresses and skirts out and about because I think it looks, not only super fly, but professional and responsible as well. I completely understand why some people prefer the classic look of jeans and tees. I really do. But what bothers me is that people keep trying to make pajamas acceptable out-of-house wear. Unless you’re running to the drug store at almost midnight for emergency tampons or face wash, pajamas are not appropriate attire for leaving the house — yes, not even if they are dyed to look like really bad, 1990s-era jeans. I really don’t want to imagine a world where we delve deeper and deeper into “the more comfortable, the better!” abyss — I mean, what’s next? Snuggies that look like coats? 

Lovelies, what do you think? Are you as terrified of these pajama-jeans for men as I am?