Whoops! I used to joke that my outfit wasn’t complete until I share a bit of my coffee or lunch with it. I wish I could say with age came grace for me, and that might eventually be true, but no dice as of yet. Assuming other Lovelies have a shaky hand with particularly stain-y food and drink, I compiled this list. Armed with its contents, may it guide you to choosing the right get-up for the nosh your day will bring. In related musings, anyone else think it’s time for the sippy cups’ comeback?


For coffee:

Sitting Birds Tie Shirt, $17.80 from Forever 21

1. A dark, busy polyester top. Layer this number or one like it over a chocolate-colored cami. That way the first line of defense is less absorbent than its cotton cousin and therefore less likely to embrace the potential stain. Also, with a tangled pattern to boot, any minor splashes from your cuppa joe are less likely to make their own statement.


For red wine:

Collection Women’s Tammy Dress – Assorted Colors, $12.24 from Target


2. A deep red dress. Assuming your drinking of said wine involves a setting more akin more of a date night or holiday party than, say, your couch (no shame!), this number can do the trick. The delicate detail can mask the wrath of a little cabernet dribble should your hand grow a bit shaky during small-talk with your boss (or the drama heats up on Gossip Girl re-runs).


Cheesy/holiday-themed popcorn

Ponte Striped Skirt, $10.99 from Forever 21

3. A light-colored mini skirt. Popcorn is meant to be consumed while in a sitting position so natch your lap is first to catch the guilty evidence of your indulgence. (I read about that somewhere, I definitely don’t experience the same issue while writing stuff for you guys. Nope.) Hide the cheese dust with the bold, white skirt.

For hot sauce and/or BBQ and/or tomato sauce:

Burnout Racerback Tank, $19.50 from Delia’s

4. A bright, floral blouse. I have to tip my invisible cowboy hat to Texas Pete because it’s him I have to thank for most of my wardrobe’s food-related stains (red wine comes in a close second). The vibrant, action-packed print of this tank seamlessly allows you to avoid a red sauce snafu on the boob. Those are the worst!

French fries/potato chips/all that is good and oh-so greasy:

Supply Co. Women’s Plus-Size Long-Sleeve Cardigan Sweater – Assorted Colors, $20.99 from Target

5. A neutral, textured cardigan. A little splish or a splash of oil spotting from your time-of-the-month grease fest will likely go unnoticed on this unassuming sweater. If you’re extra worried, please note the roomy pockets perfect for sly finger wiping. Double points!

What do you find best hides various food and drink stains? Or is this not a concern of yours and I probably should learn how to eat like an adult (i.e., not sloshing my gruel all over the place)? It’s OK if it’s the latter. That might be true.