The paparazzi caught RPattz galloping through a Los Angeles airport last week wielding some ample beard. So his new face furs, are they for a new film? To protect his tender cheeks from the oncoming winter chill? To help girlfriend Kristen Stewart with her exfoliating regime? And most importantly: Does it optimize or obliterate a dude’s hotness? We investigate a few case studies below to try to decide.
Who: Jake Gyllenhall
Why: Unknown. This photo comes from last fall. Judging from his shirt, maybe he has plans to partake in a lumberjack pancake-eating contest? Or he had tickets to see Fleet Foxes.
Workability: Low-medium. It seems like he’s overcompensating for those hopelessly adorable blue peepers of his. Perhaps if the fluffiness were scaled back a bit, it would be a little less overwhelming.
Who: Zach Efron
Why: Unknown. This snap comes from the Charlie St. Cloud premiere last fall, so maybe it’s aimed to toast up his face.
Workability: Low. I know what he’s doing here — or at least I think I do — he’s doing the whole But I’m a grown-up! thing and that’s cool. But some facial structures simply shouldn’t be hidden by little hairs. And this is one of them.
Who: Brad Pitt
Why: He needed it while filming World War Z in Malta last summer.
Workability: Medium to high. It’s Brad Pitt, guys. Plus I’m always a sucker for a little scruff on an otherwise pretty face (most of the time). However, I don’t think that he always pulls it off quite right.
Who: Ryan Gosling
Why: Don’t care.
Workability: To 11, sincerely. Remember this is the dude who the hell out of a perhaps horoscope-referencing silky jacket. And you know, other things. Like that creepy mustache in Lars and the Real Girl. What can’t the dude pull off?
What do you think about facial hair? Are there any styles you don’t tolerate? Are there any that you extra-appreciate in a dude?