Yesterday, a question came up on my dashboard on Tumblr. A 13-year old girl had asked one of the blogs I follow if she was old enough to have sex with her boyfriend. The blogger had answered that she thought the girl to be a little too young to be worrying about sex yet, and that she should wait.
I don’t know about you guys, but when I was 13, I hadn’t even kissed a guy, let alone considered having sex with one. I’m pretty sure I only had a vague idea of what sex even was. I’m also pretty sure I still played with Barbies.
Is it just me, or are girls losing their innocence at younger and younger ages? It’s so easy to go on the computer and look up everything you want to know about sex. It’s too easy. My friend once told me a story that her aunt had caught her 9 year old cousin watching porn. WTF?
Maybe I was a late bloomer. I had my first kiss when I was 14. I went through 3 boyfriends before I found the right one, and knew I was ready. I was 17, and I was in love. That sounds horribly corny, but it’s very true. I don’t regret my decision.
I have friends who have lost it at 14, and friends who are still virgins in their 20s. My point is, there is no normal time. Some girls don’t care who holds their v-card, and they get rid of it quickly. Some girls want to wait until marriage. There is nothing wrong with being a virgin, and there is nothing wrong with losing your virginity.
In my opinion, losing your virginity should be something you share with someone you love and care about, because you’ll always remember him or her. It’s an important ritual and part of growing up. Once you’ve given it away, you can’t get it back.
I don’t think giving it away to the first boy you date is smart, or having a contest with your friends to see who can lose it first is a good idea either. On the other hand, I don’t think people should wait until marriage either. You’ll have no idea what you like, or what you look for in a partner, and your wedding night will be painful and depressing. Like I said, just my opinion.
Don’t let any guy talk you into giving it away if you think you’re not ready. If a guy really likes you, he’ll be with you whether you’re having sex or not, and won’t pressure you. As always, be safe and use protection.
What do you think is normal? I want to hear your opinion!