Lovelyish

I don’t think losing your virginity is as big of a deal as everyone makes it out to be. I lost mine to my dirtbag abusive ex and I don’t think about it that often. I think it matters more who you’re sleeping with now then who you slept with then.

That’s just silly. I don’t know what she’s thinking.

She can say what she wants, but I know that I felt worthless after I lost my virginity.  It was and still is a big deal.  To me, at least.  A woman can say what she wants about her sexual partners, but if you willingly give yourself away to a bunch of people, it makes you feel crappy about yourself.  I speak from personal experience.

I didn’t listen to the video because I’m in public, but I don’t think virginity is a big deal. I lost mine young, have had a few partners, and feel perfectly fine. It hasn’t affected my life or made me feel differently about myself. 

This woman sounds completely stupid…and I’m not just saying that because I disagree with what she said.

Losing my virginity was a huge deal to me even though it happened on my wedding night. To say it’s impractical is just demeaning the fact that to a lot of women and men it is a big deal and they don’t want to waste it on someone that either doesn’t matter to them or that they know they won’t be with for the long run. 

@ohveryoung@xanga - I think what Wendy is saying reflects well in what you’ve said here.  We’re past a time where women are “giving themselves” up to the men they choose to sleep with.  There are still people who think along the same lines as you, and in my opinion that’s a somewhat archaic belief-system.  We’re coming into an age where women are seeking sexual equality. 

It’s the age old argument, “If a key opens a lot of locks, then it’s the master key. If a lock is opened by a lot of keys, then it’s a shitty lock.”  Wendy isn’t promoting promiscuity, rather she’s saying that women shouldn’t look at their virginity as this big, beautiful, important gift to give a man–because that’s not how men see it.

see, this is why I don’t like how Lovelyish does blog posts.  It’s obviously a promo clip, so of course there’s no great explanation given- why would you reference this in order to ask this question?   If the discussion is supposed to be about the purity myth, and not wendy williams, why not given the readers a super basic overview of the problems associated with cultural virginity?   It might lead to something more productive than a slew of “lol, sluts r gross, i am a virgin, it’s soooooo sad that so many gurls arent virgins anymooore!” comments. 

(which is to say: if you want to be a virgin or not have sex or whatever, it’s fine, but w/out any context, virginity topics often turn into slut-shaming bash sessions, IMO)

I can SEE what she’s saying. It’s not like Wendy is saying “go fuck around” but I dont like when people excuse things just because of the times they’re in. Was racism ok because it was the 1950s? Yes it was bad at the time but not everyone was racist in the 50s.

Just like now there are some people who are still virgins for different reasons. I have no shame in saying I’m a virgin not just because of my own personal beliefs but because I havent yet had a relationship where I thought someone should have that special part of me. Not meaning it to come out as high & mighty, I mean it has I havent had a long term relationship with love. It doesnt necessarily have to be marriage but I dont want to be just a notch on some guy’s bed post either. There are good guys left in the world & I’m just trying to find one to settle down with. I dont think of it as “losing your virginity”, you’re giving it away.

@ohveryoung@xanga - I’m sorry you had to go through that! It was brave of you to share that with everyone! Alot of people think if you have sex with alot of people, you’re wanted. The main thing isnt sex but being with the person AFTERWARDS.

@i_r_keiko@xanga - I never thought of my virginity as a gift to give someone, but that still doesn’t mean that I should have opened my legs to the amount of men that I did.  I shouldn’t have, and women shouldn’t.  If a woman enjoys having sex, like most of us do, that’s perfectly fine.  But I’m tired of women thinking that it’s okay to have as many sexual partners as she can.  It’s not cool when dudes do it, and it’s even less classy when women exhibit the same behavior.  A guys dick isn’t going to change size after he sticks it in 100+ vaginas.  The same doesn’t hold true for a woman who has tried out 100+ dicks.

@i_r_keiko@xanga - Tell me then, how do men see it?

@i_r_keiko@xanga -  And I get where you’re coming from.  I don’t see virginity as this great deflowering process, but I just feel like everyone, in general, should be more selective with who they allow between their sheets.  That’s all.

@grammarboy@xanga - Yes, I’m generalizing.  Not all men.  From my experience men see sex as a conquest, virginity doubly so.  They see it as something to “get,” not as something that was “given.”

@ohveryoung@xanga - Then it’s not the loss of your virginity that you were upset about, it was your promiscuity.  Like I said, I don’t think Wendy is promoting promiscuity by what she said, but trying to break away the stigma of sex on women, which has even affected YOU.  I don’t know if you’re implying that you’ve slept with 100+ men, or just using it as an example, but it’s all relative.  If you chose to sleep with that many men and you’re not pleased with it, then stop.  If you feel bad about it for no other reason than that society says it’s bad then fuck to your heart’s content!  It’s your choice.

–And I think this might be coming off more harsh than how I mean.  My ultimate point is that society has made women feel shameful for something that is natural for them to want, and I find that unfair.  Having celebrities say things like this is a step in the right direction in changing that.  Obviously there are going to be people who take it as a message for Free-For-All sex, but there are going to be exceptions in every case.

@i_r_keiko@xanga - Haha, no I haven’t had that many sexual partners.  God, I’d have to be busy for that.  It was just an arbitrary number.

@i_r_keiko@xanga - “We’re coming into an age where women are seeking sexual equality.”

Women can still have sexual equality and think that their virginity is important and not something to hand out. 

@CecilliaMarie@xanga - Exactly.  Virginity, whether you’re male or female, should be important.  Whether someone wants to admit it or not, you will most likely always remember your first.  Why would anyone want an awful memory to commemorate that experience?

My definition of total sexual equality: Both men and women have every right to save their virginity for the person they marry, and both have an equal responsibility to do so. The burden doesn’t fall more on one than the other 

@i_r_keiko@xanga - I disagree. It’s not really fair to men to ignore the fact that they have feelings. There’s an inherent emotional connection. Sex is an experience that’s shared more than given or taken. That connection is very powerful, and forming and tearing and reforming it leaves scars. Those who look at sex as a conquest or whatever else are only fooling themselves into thinking they’re safe from these scars. But they catch up with them in time.

@ohveryoung@xanga - Thanks for being so straight-up honest on here. Well done.

I can’t listen to the video so…yeah.  I don’t really know how virginity can be considered “impractical” because that concept doesn’t make any sense.  But I do think the traditions and stigmas and whatnot that surround it can be outdated.  I wish we could all just let other people have sex if they want to and not fucking worry about it unless it directly affects us.  If you don’t want to have sex, then don’t.  If you want to, go for it.  As long as you can deal with the consequences and implications of either one, it’s none of anybody else’s biznass.

I’m still a virgin, but I think losing my virginity would be a big deal.  One, it’s your /virginity/ & two, I’m super emotional & stuff, so if like.. it turned out badly or something, I’d be super upset.

@grammarboy@xanga - Well it would be nice if more men thought like you!

@RazielV@xanga - LMAO!!!!!  I bet.  I retract my earlier statement.  In your case, that’s highly impressive xD

@i_r_keiko@xanga @ohveryoung@xanga - I’ve tried 100 dicks. Man that was one crazy night!

@ohveryoung@xanga - I’m telling you, it was insane. It started with, “Turn your head and cough” and just got out of hand from there.

I think that as long as both partners are on the same page in the matter, it shouldn’t matter how much sex you have or don’t have. If one partner is looking for a life time, or at least a long term commitment, while the other is in it just for the lols, there will be some scars. It requires a conversation before hand so you know where you both are mentally and emotionally, and it saves a lot of heart break in the future.  

She’s dumb. She can think whatever she wants to, even if it’s impractical itself.
I think virginity is important and though it’s only MY opinion, I think it should matter to everyone. I’m not saying that you HAVE to stay abstinent until marriage or whatever, but at least make good and healthful choices about your sex life. You don’t want to have multiple partners or whatever and then later on wonder which one gave you chlamydia or something -_-

Losing my virginity wasn’t a big deal to me; I was so drunk I don’t remember it. 

It’s nice now, though, knowing that I am having sex that is quite meaningful to me and my partner. 

Wendy Williams looks like a tranny.

I see what she’s saying, do I completely and udderly agree? No. I guess it  all depends on the person; if I could go back and change who I lost it to, I would but I cant…I don’t lose sleep over it though.

I don’t agree with her at all. She may think it’s impractical for all women to be virgins, but I definitely do do agree with that AT ALL. The fact that she didn’t give a valid reason makes me think that she’s just saying that to get some air time….

I didn’t care about my virginity, and I never really did. I’m glad I lost it to who I lost it too, but if I hadn’t, it’s whatever. And having however many sexual partners I want is fine also. Not saying I’m gonna go sleep wit 50 men, but if I’m attracted to someone, enjoy their company, and wanna have sex with them, I will.

@ask_ashleyyy@xanga - http://www.facebook.com/pages/STOP-using-the-word-Tranny-Its-disrespectful-degrading-offensive/226313670713352
(unless you meant to be offensive, in which case, I guess the link doesn’t apply)

too many guys are giving themselves up or throwing themselves at me, but I refuse, because I’m waiting for the hard to catch big shark, and not the easy minions that swim my way and want to bite my bait that isn’t meant for them I don’t even like fishing. ttfn.

She’s entitled to her opinion. However, she may not value her v-card as much as some women value theirs. 

virginity is a big deal. and it is possible to date and not do it. And you’re relationships will be better for it. I dare you to try it.

Maybe if we didn’t all make such a concept out of this “virginity thing” we wouldn’t care so much about it?

huh?

i’m going to tap that ass before i marry it, no doubt.