Lovelyish

I wish I had 60 pairs of shoes :/ lol

60 pairs of shoes?  Seriously?  I probably have like 5.

i love getting new stuff… espcially clothing. and when i was living at home with my parents and didnt have to pay bills i was always getting new stuff. but real life has a way of ruining that habbit. i’d rather not worry over if im going to have enough money for gas to get to work or what im going to eat on the weekends. im a saver not a spender and it makes my life a lot less stress free i think.

I love shopping and buying new clothes too, but I only have like 4 pairs of shoes and 6 pairs of pants…and maybe like, 20 tops?

Everyone has something that makes them unique, every woman something that makes only them beautiful in that way; it’s up to them to find it.  Last I checked we own possessions, not the other way around.

If you feel great distress when you can’t buy something, you might want to ease off your addiction or get help.

Often times selfishness and excessiveness in an area, wether it be neediness, looking out for number 1, materialistic, being a cry baby or whatever it is, is linked back to one key emotion: Panic. It’s a feeling of lacking in control over things in your life, thus it creates insecurity and dependancy. Posting on lovelyish won’t help you. You need a shrink. Yeah, you might feel awesome when you get something new but round and round the merry go round turns, until it topples over and leaves nothing more than disaster in it’s wake. 

I wouldn’t consider myself a shopaholic. I don’t have a compulsive need to buy things, and I like hoarding my money or sending it to my parents. 

On the other hand, though, I do own a lot of things. Mostly due to the fact that I still wear things I bought 4 years ago. I buy expensive jeans; I don’t think I’ve ever paid less than 60 dollars for jeans; but three years later I’m still wearing them. 

I’ve only spent thousands of dollars on ebay thus far I probably wore 25% or 1 out of 4 items. I was mostly collecting clothes,shoes and accessories than wearing them, so I didn’t buy things to showoff, so it wasn’t merely being superficial, because I think I was so possessive that I didn’t want others to see what I have since they would likely ask to borrow my things like some have in the past and gave me excuses that they lost the item. I like the limited edition items or one of a kind items, some vintage, some new, but mostly ooak items that I found on ebay. I kept my fashion sanctuary mostly to myself I used to be a shopoholic, but that was to temporarily relieve my depression, because shopping increased my mood. however, it didn’t really stabilize my mood for long. I’ve since cut back on shopping and am onto other free addictions to alleviate some stress; youtube forever baby free hobbies are better than debt accumulating ones. some people turn to alcohol, drugs, smoking, or mine happened to be shopping or whatever other addictions to alleviate stress. I don’t think that I need help though because I’m too logical and aware of who I am and why the way that I am, so I don’t need a stranger psychologist to analyze me or get me to reveal key evidence to give me a label that something else is wrong with me. I prefer to self reflect on my life and problems and figure things out for myself with critical thinking and soul searching anyway, I’ve been there and yep, I still love shopping, but I’m limiting myself. I used to be no limit, but after I bought just about everything, there really isn’t anything else to buy, since the new styles are mostly fugly. did you see those moccasin shoes

I like to internet-window shop, but I’m too much of a life-plan-oriented type of person to splurge like that with my own money. The last time I spent thousands of dollars, it was a guy’s I was using. I feel bad, now, but it was sooo fun shopping, then. I’ve turned my life around since then, though (shopping-wise.) Real love =/= a paycheck. I’ve been mentally noting wants and needs. I only need  to run— everything else can wait until I am successful. And, then, I probably won’t want any of that anymore.

I’m no shopaholic, but I think it’s crazy that all these people are saying they only have 4 or 5 pairs of shoes. I seriously do have something around 60 pairs of shoes as well. I also happen to still wear some shoes that I’ve had for 5 years, so that could help. I honestly couldn’t imagine not having so many shoes to choose from! lol.

I have the same problem. 
I LOVE CLOTHES.

Honestly, sounds like you could benefit from seeing a therapist about this.

I feel your pain and problem although I’ll admit that I’m not that bad anymore.. Ever since I started working, I’ve been spending around 600 dollars a month =_= on crap that I don’t need. It doesn’t help that I work at a thrift store (they sell a lot of new and high quality clothes as well) so I used to buy impulsively (not anymore since they enforced a new rule about us not allowed to buy anything unless the manager cashes us out =_=). I shop online a lot for discounts as well and I’m crazy about sales.  Anyway, I managed to somewhat get in control since I bought a laptop a few months ago and only realized how bad it was when I couldn’t pay my credit card fully 2 months ago. So I went through this weird withdrawal symptom of adding things on my cart and canceling my order last minute. LOL and it feels good being in control. So now I spend around 100 bucks each month which is fair since I do have my phone bill and other necessities that are more important that clothes. Now, I’m really picky since I realized that sale items make me impulsive and I want to make sure I’m buying quality stuff that I would wear often.

I used to be totally addicted to ebay/shopping.  I’ve cut down big time since buying a small apartment which means less room/money.  I try to focus my energies on other things.  Also I allow myself to “window” shop online..add to basket, think about it a few days later.  Usually the urge subsides, or the item is no longer available.

Wow, that’s really sad :-/ 

That’s pretty bad.

I like getting free stuff or finding expensive shit for cheap (like less than $5 cheap) at thrift shops. Beyond that, I hate to shop.I hate shoes, too.

Maybe you can try calling someone when you want to buy something and ask them what they’re up to (hopefully they’re not shopping either).

Get to the register and ask if they can put the items on hold. Step away from the store and if after a few hours and see if you remember every item you wanted buy.

It might be better for you to not enter the store at all. If it’s a place like Kmart that has clothes and other items you def. need, then make an actual list on paper before and only stick to that!

I’ve heard before that when we spend money on experiences (movies, concerts, plays, etc) we’re a much happier than if we buy a bunch of things. It can be easy to think “Oh, this top will look so cute when I wear it out!” However, you probably have something equally as cute in your closet!

Make a budget. Only allot a certain amount to make up, clothes, shoes, etc each month. Save the rest and make a splurge on a really worthy item when you have enough.

You can think about saving money and donating that towards a worthwhile charity.

Think about long term happiness. Sounds like the “rush” you get within that hour can only be described as short term happiness. Same goes for an over eater who wants another brownie. You can have the brownie and feel that short term elation. However, it feels so much more satisfying to not eat the brownie when really that person is looking for a long term goal like weight loss. So think about trips or concerts or grad school or a house or saving up for future kids or wedding or buy a hybrid car, w/e you want for the long term. 

I wouldnt go straight for expensive therapy. You can check out your college’s health center and see what resources they have for mental health services. Or join a community online. Let everyone in your life know that you want to change your addictive habits so that they can check on you.

I was that way with jeans when I was in high school…. though never with that much money. However, now I’d love to buy some clothes but I can’t even afford to buy clothes for my two children. Times are tough. Appreciate the luxury you have and set a better spending trend for yourself as in the near future of adulthood you may very well be hurting financially at some point too. Better to have something aside. A much bigger feeling of accomplishment comes with making wise decisions that provide you with more abundance in the future. 

Also, screw what other people think about your clothes. Wear what you like. Buying from K-Mart hasn’t even been in trend as far as I know so let that be a lesson that you don’t need to have the best of the best to feel good. Get resourceful, use accessories to change things up (get creative and make some of your own… feels much better than buying). If I had a ton of money after bills were paid, kids were provided for, and money was put away for savings I’d love to stock up on fun shoes and clothes but, at the moment I’d just be happy to know I’ll be able to pay the bills the following month.

With some perspective you have no reason to feel the “need” to shop. It’s a privilege and should not be taken in excess. Treating yourself every now and then is great but using entire paychecks for clothes is more than a treat.

@coolasacucumber - That’s awesome advice! Thank U for the tips! I’m going to work again this summer so I hope I can actually KEEP $ in my savings account >.<

P.S.- I always donate to the less fortunate and local charity places. && all the clothes and shows I barely wear and don’t need anymore goes straight to charity!!

@SuburbanSweetheart - I don’t think I need to see a therapist. If I had monthly apartment/house payments and car & cellphone bills due BUT I spent that $ on shopping for clothing, THEN, it is a serious problem to seek a therapist. 

I’m just a 19 year old, full-time college student who is jobless but get hundreds of dollars from my parents every 2 to 3 weeks (& some $ from my boyfriend), with a really awesome wardrobe.  I don’t have responsibilities yet so I splurge what I get on clothing (& I was taught to give 15% of whatever $ I receive to charity so I’m always giving away $20 bills to the unfortunate and homeless. Soooo, all my $$ doesn’t go to just clothes and stuff.)

Trust me people! These NYC K marts got some pretty nice tops and jeans. K mart really stepped their game up over the decade! (They got some alright little flip-flops and sandals too for young women)

I’d rather save up and splurge on a few pairs of shoes and clothes than buy them at Kmart…

@not3000@xanga - I don’t buy all my clothes at K Mart anymore. Ever since I moved to Miami for college, I buy expensive items now. Actually, I haven’t found not 1 cheap bargain store where I’m at so it’s whatever. 

I just recently spent $465 of 5 different sunglasses. I now buy tops that are worth over a hundred bucks….  basically the mall I shop at is pretty high-class. I just thank God I got $.

I used to bring about $500 to the mall every time. I never realized how unnecessary it was.. and how screwed I’d get if I got mugged. Now I’ve limited myself to $100 and I don’t even spend all of it. Sometimes not even any. Just limit yourself to what you really need and how much to spend. I hope it’s not a visa or debit card.. it’s harder to control yourself with that. I go to a public school, and it’s true SOMETIMES that if you’re dressed differently, you’ll get talked about, but everyone gets talked about. The chances are you won’t see everyone for the rest of your life. You shouldn’t feel the need to shop in excess. I dunno.. maybe find something else to do. Read, work out, cook! Personally whenever I feel the need to buy something expensive (I would never spend over $100 on a top unless it’s silk or leather) I think about how other people could use the money better than how I’m wasting it on myself excessively, and then I don’t feel the need to anymore. Then I end up donating it… LOL What’s this high-class mall? I’d love to see it.

I’m only a shopaholic when it comes to certain items. For me, it’s DRESSES.
I have 2 pairs of jeans.
I have 26 dresses.

..do you know what the winters are like in Ohio? ABSOLUTELY FREEZING.

So I invest in tights and wear my skirts and dresses all year round. People think I’m crazy.
I think I’m crazy cute

Wow. That’s a lot of shopping.

I’m really bad about buying things whenever I get emails saying stores are having sales, too =/. I LOVE buying stuff but luckily (or not so..) I’m really picky about the clothes I buy so I don’t really buy things veryvery often.

Like some other girl said, I often ‘window shop’ online and put things in my shopping basket & then really think if I need it or not and I usually decide that I don’t.

wow. I haven’t been shopping in months. and I very much enjoy shopping. But I gotta pay for school.

and yeah, I own tops 5 pairs of shoes.
never understand the whole girls own like 50 pairs of shoes thing. My sister does and to me its just a waste of space.

I guess I go through cycles. I bought two shirts, one sweater and a pair of shoes in the past six months. I have everything else.

Your lust is not for clothes, but the action of shopping! Go a store that isn’t the one you work at, fill up the cart and then leave it in an aisle (horrible for the workers there, I know) and you’ll get that same shopping high without having to buy anything.

To prevent yourself from turning into a horder as well as a shopaholic, you should probably clean out your closet quarterly and take what you don’t wear to Goodwill, or a consignment shop where you can actually make a lil cash.  Share the fashion   I am in the same boat as you are, with a little more self control   I haven’t got quite as many clothes as you, but I’ll bet I have more variety…after raiding thrift shops for unique stuff, and my grandma’s closet!  You should look into styling, being a personal shopper for people!  That’s the career I want, and it seems you’d be perfect for it too!

@Shytooth@xanga - why on earth do you need sixty pairs of shoes?!

@not3000@xanga - You can actually find some nice pieces at k-mart… Nothing wrong with splurging though… also nothing wrong with finding a great piece in a inexpensive store…

@fields_of_sunflowers@xanga - To LIVE!!!!! lol j/k

@reesa14@xanga - I own a bunch collected from years of wear.. most are dead gym shoes from highschool that got scribbled on by friends… Then there are the dress shoes from school dances or formal parties… I kept them because i often re wear… Except the stank gym shoes… lol

they all got murdered in storage in my last move though… I’ll have years to collect again though… I only by a new set of shoes every season… lol like as in a pair of gym shoes, a pair of sandals, a few of dress for special occasions, and two or three casual… and i have one set of winter boots and my kick some guy in balls sexy black leather boots lol…

well not every season every year for the seasons… not to stay on “trend” but i often do damage in my shoes… maybe i should just get them repaired…

@RoxyRuez@xanga - I’ve no problem with buying things from kmart (although I prefer wal-mart), but going into the store with my leftover $60 USD and spending every last penny there is something I’d rather not to. Sure, maybe I’ll get a shirt or a bathing suit or some nice sandals, but I won’t blow all my extra money there… but I was just stating my opinion.

I know how it feeels …except I’m broke now and the shopping had to stop.

@Sinful_Soul1@xanga - so what you’re really saying, according to your comments, you’re a spoiled girl who overpays for things because they have a pretty brand on them. 

Yeah, I’m so glad I clicked this link. 

@Kendall - Not so much spoiled. I’m just receiving a lot of $ from my parent due to the fact that I’m still dependent on them and go to college 1500 miles away from home. I do not have a job due to the fact that I want to focus more on my studies. My major is Pre-Law so I’m always hitting the books and pulling all-nighters with all these business and philosophy classes.

Unfortunately, my $ goes straight to clothes and accessories. When this spring semester of college ends, which is this week, I have to go back to my old job and save up $ for college books and HOPEFULLY a car. To get around in FL , you seriously need a car…..very different than NYC. If I saved that $ my parent give me, I could afford a nice car….. 

I also online shopping when I’m bored. How can I suppress that? >.< I sooo have an addiction

i totally agree with you. YES. shopping seems to be the only remedy to really satisfy my greedy needs. 

i’m still finding ways in getting control of it. the problem is as long as the work stress is around, i hunger for shopping– like mad. it makes me feel so much lighter in heart and then the stress would inevitably be less visible and less real. kiddish but i think alot of us do suffer from that, but in different circumstances. 

I’m the same! shopping just makes me feel happy, i feel good while i shop and after ive shopped and even before ive shopped if i know i will be going shopping soon – and when i get to wear the stuff ive bought it makes me feel excited to put together an outfit and also gives me confidence when i wear it. i dont think a week can pass without me buying something. a lot of people think i’m superficial but if it makes you happy, and its not hurting anyone, why feel bad about it? 

I do like shopping (mostly skincare and makeup), but the things is, I also love research lol, and I won’t buy anything until I know it’s good. So usually I will look at tons of reviews, and wait, sometimes for weeks, read more reviews, read the ingredients, see whether they test on animals, etc. After I do all that and I still think the product is worth the money, then I’ll buy it. So I don’t buy very often, but when I do, it’s researched to death and usually pretty expensive. I think i’m pretty weird…