It’s no news that college is the time of your life for drunken debauchery, and living in the thick of it–as opposed to with your parents–you tend to quickly pick up on a few things.
1. Only drink Four Loko under certain conditions. If you prefer getting slammed into being drunk rather than gradually getting drunk, drink Four Loko. If you have very little money but want to get drunk, drink Four Loko. But DO NOT drink the entire Four Loko. Because if you are a normal person you may explode. Or you’ll just get fat. (There’s 660 calories in one can!) Words of wisdom, people.*
2. The smell of alcohol-induced vomit lingers. Throwing up in your dorm after a big night out isn’t going to win you any favors. Gotta puke? Do it outdoors. In an isolated spot. In the woods. Or try a bathroom (the toilet, not the sink). Otherwise, it will stink up the entire floor for weeks and everyone will hate you. This isn’t a stench that can be covered up with heavy doses of Febreze and a strongly-scented body mist.
3. Even if you follow the two-week rule**, you can still become a drunk. Plan accordingly. Sometimes, people without alcohol experience only learn their limits when they go wild crazy and drink the equivalent of seven standard drinks (if you drink one Four Loko, you can get six of those drinks out of the way!) within a relatively short amount of time and then throw up four times and then cannot stand the idea of alcohol after that. You don’t want to be one of those people.
4. If you plan on drinking, it might help you to learn what kind of drunk you are beforehand. Are you a belligerent drunk? Depressive drunk? Mean drunk? Happy drunk? Funny drunk? Knowing this can help you make or lose friends. Not knowing this can give your drinking buddies ammunition to mock you for your freshman year transgressions for the rest of your life.
5. Drinking every night of the week is academic suicide. Like in real life, moderation and balance are key. As much as you want to participate in Tipsy Tuesday and Wasted Wednesday, if you’re partying every night you will probably be studying-deficient, which–shocker!–does not help your G.P.A. I hear academic probation is just as scary as it sounds!
*Due to recent legislation, the original formula of this drink is now illegal in a few states. And Four Loko took out the caffeine and taurine and guarina. Which basically means you’ll be left with a drink that tastes, overall, pretty crappy and disgusting. But it’ll probably still make you fat.
**This rule states that, in the first two weeks of college, you should not do anything that you did not do prior to coming to college. Most often, this refers to things like alcohol and drugs and random promiscuous sexual encounters.
What lessons did you learn about drinking from college, Lovelies?
guest
I’ve never drank before, but I know that drinking can change a person. My friends used to be pretty good about academics. Now they do just enough to scrape by and spend the rest of their time partying. Pretty sad.
daisy / 501 posts
How about this– I’m a current college junior and I haven’t had a sip of alcohol in my life. My friends make fools of themselves every weekend when they drink and I’ve decided that’s not the kind of life I want to live.
guest
Definitely. I drink 2/3 of a Four Loko and that’s it. I actually do prefer it over gradually getting drunk, then I stop drinking.
orchid / 137 posts
If you’re going to drink, it’s a really good idea to do it with someone who you can trust especially if you’re at a party. You know never what can happen and who will be there. You don’t want to get yourself into a drunken situation that you will forever regret.
guest
@you_were_the_song_all_along@xanga - i’m right with you. i’m only a college freshman but i’ve never had interest in alcohol (never even tried it), and i never will.
guest
@you_were_the_song_all_along@xanga - @bAbiiExxPiNay@xanga - I like these two responses. Spoken out of experience. Not of indulging in the drinking myself, but witnessing my friends trash themselves, night after night, weekend after weekend, throughout the entire semester. Oh, and then I had that friend that passed away from Alcohol poisoning.
I’m avoiding labeling every college student out there, but I’ve also noticed that most students who get drunk also end up driving. Granted, most college students reside in areas where they walk back to their dorms or apartments, or take a bus, but there are some exceptions. And driving and getting behind the wheel, is the worst thing you can do. Once again spoken out of the experience of loosing some people that I knew just for this reason. I’m not preaching, nor am I trying to be cynical. Heck, I might even be irrelevant here. But I just hope to get my opinion across.
Anyway, I don’t personally drink, but it looks like you’ve come up with a good list of tips. I could probably pass these on to my roommates and friends that do drink!
daisy / 699 posts
Let’s all try to keep in mind that this post is for those who have already made the decision to drink. It’s not trying to persuade others to join in or endorse drinking. Just like condoms are there because we’re all going to have sex no matter what, this post is here for those who are going to drink no matter what.
guest
“Alcohol equals puke, equals smelly mess, equals nobody likes you.”
orchid / 173 posts
freshman and sophomore year i drank every weekend (friday and saturday) and almost every thursday. as a junior (and first semester senior) i cut back on partying because my schoolwork was getting more serious. this is my last semester though, and with only three class and a five day weekend, i plan on four lokoing my way to graduation.
the most important thing i’ve learned is that if you’re a known partier, that label sticks. i told my friends that i had to stay in to study for a major exam, and none of them took me seriously. it took almost an hour of concinving to get them to leave me alone :/
daisy / 693 posts
Wow there is classy drinking
Here are some better lessons
1. Drink when properly hydrated2. Drink on a full stomach3. You don’t have to be completely shit faced to have fun4. When you’re shit faced, people perceive you negatively5. It’s fine to just stop at tipsy, or never drink at all
guest
I’m not in college yet, and I don’t go to very many house parties, but I’ve got it down to three core rules:
1.) If you can’t handle something that tastes like alcohol, you shouldn’t be drinking alcohol. (I’m looking at you, cocktail lovers.)
2.) You should not, under any circumstances, drink around people you don’t trust.
3.) There is really no sense or appeal in getting past the “pleasantly drunk” stage. Why would anyone WANT to vomit and black out?
guest
if you’re gonna drink, make sure you have people taking care of you that night!
Check out my blog!
http://t.luuux.com/SH5PD?url=http://www.luuux.com/members/tiffany
magnolia / 1357 posts
DON’T MIX DRINKS!!!
That’s the best advice I can give.
sunflower / 392 posts
Eat before drinking, drink water during and after drinking…
If you plan on getting completely trashed, do it on a night where you don’t have an 8am class the following morning.
Public drunkenness is tacky. It is possible to drink without getting black-out drunk.
Just because a person buys you a drink, doesn’t mean you actually have to drink it.
Oh, and just because the people around you are drinking doesn’t mean you have to drink too. There is nothing wrong with declining to drink.
guest
how about have some self control and drink in moderation?
guest
I haven’t made any friends to party with them at that level.. since I tend to be the kind to drink to get drunk so I stick with people I know best.
guest
good tips. drinking can get tricky, always make sure you have friends around.
guest
agreed
guest
Why not just…drink sensibly? Drinking to get drunk is pointless, it’s a waste of money, and you’ll end up broke and feeling shitty the next day. I don’t drink to get drunk anymore…believe me, I learned that lesson. I go out with my friends and I have a couple of drinks, then I switch to virgin cocktails or diet coke or red bull if I need the energy boost. I end up getting a great night’s sleep at the end of it, and I can function like a normal person the next day, haha.
guest
Things I’ve learned about alcohol over college:
1. YOU DON’T HAVE TO DRINK.
guest
6. If you feel like you’re going to puke, get your ass up & do it. Don’t keep denying that you’re going to puke until you’re vomiting in your own trash can. It’s not worth buying another trash can & cleaning up the mess when you’re so hungover you could die. Lol.
Also, avoid wine. It’s like Four Loko. & it probably makes you fat, too.
sunflower / 370 posts
I learned:
1. To stick with my rule of stopping when I feel tipsy, regardless of what people say. Anything after a little buzz is not my thing.
2. To drink lots of water after drinking.
dahlia / 2103 posts
@airbornerose@xanga - Yes, thank-you. Now I don’t feel the say it, cuz I was definitely thinking it
dahlia / 2103 posts
Good list. Yes, there is always the option to not do it at all, but if you do, it pays to have guidelines to keep yourself out of too much major trouble. I didn’t really start drinking until my senior year of college; the year after was when I started to hit it a little harder.
Number one rule: WATER. Drink tons of water and you won’t get a hangover…works for me every time. Start out hydrated & on a full stomach too. I can have probably a good 10 shots, give or take a few, in a night and I’ll be fine the next day if I drink 3 huge glasses of water before I go to bed. Also, look up how many calories are in alcohol…that’s one of the biggest reasons I don’t drink heavily too often. You can end up consuming your entire daily calorie count in drinks alone.
guest
@airbornerose@xanga - well said sisstaaa
guest
@you_were_the_song_all_along@xanga - in the words of SNL’s version of joy behar, “so what! who cares!”
guest
I just learned I don’t like beer, period. I learned the summer before college that drinking shots makes me get weepy though.
guest
It can be good, and it can be bad… I drink to celebrate things, but I try to avoid drinking because it’s the only thing to do (it never is) or because I’m nervous around new people. I’m a college sophomore, if that information helps.