Before I got married, I had an awesome bachelorette party put on for me by my friends. There were many good memories, but one which stands out is that it was my first time ever using the ladies room instead of the men’s room.
I was worried going into the night about ordering drinks with my male ID and using the restroom, but both things ended up going wonderfully. It was really a highlight to finally use the correct bathroom.
Bathrooms are often one of the most gendered spaces in the average person’s life (at least public restrooms). I remember in my mind seeing the sign “Women’s”; wanting to go in there like all the other girls, and forcing myself to turn away. Forcing myself to be male. Even as I came out of the closet and went out more as my female self, I avoided the bathrooms.
On this night, there was no avoiding. We were at TGIFridays and I had to go. I got a friend to come with me, explaining to her on the way that this would be my first time in the ladies room. When we got in there we realized that a few of my other friends were already there. We explained that it was my first time, so everyone insisted on taking a ladies room mirror pic, as is custom.
The bathroom itself wasn’t radically different, besides the lack of urinals. I expected it to be a little more different, but regardless – I felt I was where I belonged. I was a female, in the female restroom. And that feeling was wonderful.
Needless to say, there was plenty of drinking going on that night, so I ended up using it again. The next four times that night were while I was drunk, and at a Gay Bar, which also made for an interesting experience. None of those times did I feel like I should worry about being kicked out, and most of the other women in line treated me like any other woman.
What is something major in your life that others do not think would be important?