Wonderful women, it breaks my heart to see us tear each other down. We are classified by weight and appearance, whether we are healthy, or how we dress. We are forever engaged in a civil war with our gender, and the battle is painfully trivial.
We have all felt the humiliation and defeat, the sadness and loneliness of being a woman among other women. We fight over who is more attractive on the outside, unaware that the ugliness on the inside is competing in its own sick, twisted beauty pageant. We have felt the sting of harsh words, and the nagging feeling that somewhere, someone is coughing a catty remark just out of earshot.
We are better than this. All of us.
You are not beautiful solely because you are thin, nor are you beautiful solely because you are heavy.
You are not better than the woman who shops at Wal-Mart because you buy your clothes at Nordstrom.
You are not less successful as a waitress than the business woman who works across the street.
You are not wiser because you are old, and you are not less intelligent because you are young.
I beg you.
We are setting an example to young girls who will someday take our place.
We are telling them to judge themselves and others. We are conditioning hateful rivalry.
Our message to each other needs to change.
You are fat. You are thin. You are in-between.
You are short. You are tall. You are average.
Your hair is black, brown, blonde, red, and every other color of the rainbow.
You have freckles. You have hidden birthmarks.
You have pale skin, olive skin, and dark skin.
You wear dresses, you wear jeans, you wear comfy sweatpants.
You have memories. You have favorite things.
You have mothers. You have daughters.
You have fathers. You have sons.
You have sisters and brothers.
You have boyfriends and husbands.
You have people that love you unconditionally.
Isn’t it time we learned to love each other in return?
Sincerely,
A fellow female.
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Aww. Let’s scissor.
orchid / 116 posts
Great post
Wish it was this simple, but I’m somehow going to make it a mission to start a program to help girls know who they areo, and to embrace everything and love it.
daisy / 743 posts
finally, a worthwhile read on lovelyish
lily / 5148 posts
Wish it was that simple =/ Good post though
orchid / 101 posts
Great letter.
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dahlia / 2382 posts
@boilingicicle@xanga - Agreed.
orchid / 161 posts
Beautiful post…I’m so glad that there is finally something like this posted!
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I like this. Especially considering some of the comments I see on Xanga sometimes. It’s great to be honest with others and share your opinion, but clearly some women on here just say brutal shit just to say it.
When you can find great friendship in another woman it’s a great feeling. Cause I’m sorry but there are just some things men are not going to understand about you.
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It’s nice to love in return, but we can’t learn to love something. It’s better to have some respect to one another space and not going around spread bad air. It comes with experience.
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Great post! very deep and so true..
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good post and great letter. there has been much hate going around. all humans should support, respect, and make a serious, meaningful effort to understand one another, regardless of gender, race, height, weight, etc.
orchid / 129 posts
Love it!
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<3
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thanks for posting
I applaud youa letter can encourage a lost soul in this worldand this healed soul will make a difference in this world
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http://hereswhatyouare.com/
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love this.
daisy / 543 posts
Amazing post, now a new favorite of mine.
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i wish i could say, “great post.” i appreciate the sentiment and departure from cattiness, but some of those things just aren’t true.
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@MissPixieGlitter@xanga - What’s not true?
Is the more affluent person who can afford and chooses to spend more money on clothing a better person? No.
Is the business professional more successful than the waitress? I guess that depends on your particular definition of success. I define it as having achieved the goals one has set for herself. If her goal is to have a job with which she can support herself & her family, and make sure they have the things they need, especially in this time of recession where some people can’t find a job at all, then the waitress has succeeded just as well.
Is the thinner person happier because she is thin? Is the fatter person happier because she got to eat a dessert the thinner one passed over? Maybe the thinner person is happier than she would be as a bigger person, and the larger person is happier than she would be as a thinner person. Maybe neither of them is happy. Either way, neither of them is better than any other woman out there.
I think we all want to feel superior, and we often do so by slamming the people who aren’t like us. It’s cruel & unnecessary. I don’t believe it will ever cease to happen, because there have been catty women from the beginning of time & you can’t police the world. But if most of us put forth the effort to treat the people around us with basic human kindness, regardless of what they look like, how much money they make, what clothes they wear… wouldn’t that allow us all to be a little more secure in ourselves and happier with our lives?
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@kristinabean@xanga - Well said!
sunflower / 338 posts
I approve.
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Yes, it’s definitely time!
orchid / 105 posts
Approve!
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I am a young woman and I too approve this message!

sunflower / 447 posts
Great post
sunflower / 331 posts
aww this is so nice!
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@ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - ahahahah goddammit ive missed you <3
hydrangea / 54 posts
definitely correct! every single one of us should noticed that. Someone is better AND worse than we are. What makes us different?
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aren’t women more than just appearances?
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Gosh I wish it was this simple, but fact is, I’m too envious, and too jealous. My sense of humor strikes again, sorry…
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this post was inspiring. i wish more women were like this. but nevermind those who arent. theyire not worth your time.
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great post
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Good post…but you forgot about girlfriends. Not every womin is heterosexual.
orchid / 173 posts
Nice job lovelyish. That was a really good post.
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I LOVE this <3333
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isn’t this what beauty is all about; isn’t it about loving ourselves and eachother?
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GIRL POWER! Dudette, awesome post!
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Wow, this letter made me get all choked up! That was amazing
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I love all these inspirational blogs today. I totally agree. I hate the way girls at my high school talk to/about each other.
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great post,
its definitely time for every woman to see this.
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Awesome post. If only it was that simple to make women unite with each other. If women united together, don’t you think men would be in trouble for running the world? Lol.
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&$$*%(&^&, if this stuff is really true, I’m not a part of it.
Nice post though
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amen! thanks for posting this
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great post!now if we could only act on this…
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Wonderful sentiments.
sunflower / 295 posts
Love this!
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Reminds me of a feminist novel that has to do with an Utopia, where the only humans on the earth were female, and the world was a perfect place. There was no need for competition and everyone was part of the sisterhood. Women were motherly, warm and looked out for each other. Yay!
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This kinda stuff realy brings out the best in people. I love it. Now if only it would happen. Idk Maybe it will start with me.
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It really is that simple… we just make it hard.
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@ShimmerBodyCream@xanga - ahahaha
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“You have boyfriends and husbands.”
And girlfriends and wives :] wanna include everyone