I recently turned 25, which is a “landmark” birthday. Being a quarter of a century old, you tend to reflect. Not just on the past year but even further back. I started thinking about high school and how it was such an awkward and unpleasant time in my life. I wish there were things I knew then that I know now to help me get through it. Here are some things I wish I could tell my younger self:
1. You’ll get boobs!
You may be a late bloomer… but you will get boobs! I promise! And they are FANTASTIC (in my humble opinion). You will be at a weight that you never imagined, no you’re not fat just curvy. You will fill out your jeans a little more, it’s good to be a little curvy, and your tops. Just be patient.
2. Prom wasn’t that great. You aren’t going to have a date to prom, but it’s not the end of the world. You won’t grow up regretting not going because your older self really didn’t get the big deal. So don’t feel bad, you’ll have a much funner time having a night with friends. Besides… you don’t want to go with any of those boys anyways
3. Be bold! Raise your hand more often in class, speak up for yourself, and maybe tell that boy you like him (it won’t kill you!). You may be afraid to answer a question wrong in front of the class, but it’s how you learn and build confidence. Those “cool kids” really aren’t that cool and they have no right to judge you. Just know that they are only “cool” in the little bubble that is high school, not outside of it. So don’t let them ever make fun of you and if they do… say something back!
4. It all works out. You may think grades and the drama of high school is the end of the world… but it’s not. You get out of high school alive. You go to fashion school to pursue your love, you have a fantastic time in college and make fantastic friends. You are now living in New York City (your dream!) and living a happy, fulfilled life. You work at this really fun blog called Lovelyish Just stay focused on what you want and don’t worry other people say.
5. You are beautiful. You may not have been voted “class hottie” or “most beautiful eyes” (you should have!), but that doesn’t mean you’re not attractive. You are beautiful and don’t let anyone tell you differently. Just because you earned some scars on your legs from surgery, doesn’t mean they’re ugly. Show them off! Wear shorts more often! Just because the stupid boys didn’t ask you out, doesn’t mean you’re not going to find a great guy who appreciates you (you will!).
Well that’s my list. What would you tell your younger self? Or what would you hope your younger self would tell you?
ranunculus / 3285 posts
Aww that was cute. I’d tell my younger self not to dwell so much on the past.
guest
i’d tell my younger self to party more and not be so tight laced probably.
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<3
ranunculus / 3457 posts
Excellent, love this post. I wish I could’ve told my younger self all that too…
I would add:
Boys don’t matter
Most problems are actually quite small in the grand scheme of things… they’re not worth fretting over.
Friends grow apart.
sunflower / 310 posts
I like this, it’s real.
guest
love this. <3
daisy / 522 posts
I liked this! Except for #2… prom WAS great lol
guest
I like this post.
I would probably say all the same things and then add:
- That friend that is getting on your nerves but you just can’t shake, let her know she is bugging you and give her the summer alone, it’s not worth the trouble.
also, – You don’t have to go to college, seriously don’t waste your money. The college that you can afford will screw you in the ass and take your money.
guest
I didn’t have a date for my senior prom either lol. I turned down a guy who wanted to go as friends because the person I really wanted to ask me to prom never did and I was too shy to ask guys out myself :/ I’m glad though because I had so much fun with my other friends who went stag.
I would add to this list:
1. Don’t go to college for a certain major just because you have a full scholarship.
2. Stop obsessing over boys and just have fun with your friends! You will have much more success with your love life once you enter college and there are more (better) fish in the sea
3. Listen to your friends when they tell you a guy is no good for you.
4. Don’t try to be someone that you are not just because you want to impress people when you are bored and lonely.
rose / 785 posts
i don’t even know what i would tell my younger self. i haven’t stopped learning; i could still be as wrong right now as i was back then.
dahlia / 2103 posts
Oh yayyy! I love this post. I just turned 25 too, and those are all things I would probably tell myself. The main thing I would have told my high school self is: stop hiding behind oversized t-shirts, glasses, and your band nerd persona…other people don’t matter, because you define yourself. Also would have warned myself about a couple of boyfriends I had in college
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I like your post. Agreed with all of the things you said.
orchid / 107 posts
I think I would tell myself to think before acting. Sometimes I act too quickly on a whim.
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if I couldve told my younger self some stuff I would told her that
A) dont be so obsessed with fitting in…those people who were in the popular cliques ended up being complete losers and druggies after high school
B) weight is just a number: you end up being happy at a weight higher than you have ever been. you dont need to be 105 pounds and a size 3 to be happy. happiness is a bigger picture than the size of your waist.
C) speak up: defend yourself, tell people what is on your mind….learn to communicate your feelings effectively now to save you the trouble in the future.
D) sex will not make you feel anymore of a woman: I wish I could have convinced myself more that staying a virgin was a good idea…..cause all the men I have been with I have not loved and kind of regret.
E) your family is more loving and understand than you think. they will be there for you through the hardest phases in your life and still love you unconditionally.
F) Dont trust people so easily: As soon as they have the opportunity to advance or go further by trampling over you, they will. watch your back and always be two steps behind to watch those sneaky mother fuckers.
im sure there is more but thats it for now.
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1. Dont eat that!
2. Dont have fuck buddies
3. Focus more on school work
4. Dont drink and drive
5. Be nicer
guest
great list, very honest
hydrangea / 60 posts
I liked this. Even at 18, some of this applies, since I’m done with school. I think most people get more comfortable with themselves as they grow up.
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haha I didn’t have a prom date either! its no big deal as i look back on it. hmmm what could i say to myself? Don’t try so hard to fit in, there’s life after highschool, eff the cool kids in HS, don’t think you do know everything, oh there will be a boy, and the situations that happen, happened for a reason-you’ll see
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i like your post :’)
i’m 18 and i sometimes do think it’s the end of the world when i encounter some difficulties.
i always lack confidence though i want to build it up. but at least i’d tried my very best to muster the courage to tell that guy i liked him. he refused me though.
i wish i can enter university next yr and start my brand new life and forget the guy i loved.
ps i wish i’m a late bloomer too ><
guest
This was a great post. A nice change for Lovelyish
I would tell myself:
a) Don’t be anyone but yourself and do what you do for you. Free yourself from your self-consciousness and embrace who you really are.
b) Be proud of your heritage, be proud to be different from all the faces you see around you.
c) Don’t procrastinate and don’t ignore the uncomfortable aspects of life. It’ll come back to kick your ass.
d) Stop underestimating yourself.
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Great post. Thanks!
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sunflower / 437 posts
I think I might be too young to really have a list of things to tell my younger self.. then again, my young-teen years were pretty stupid.
1. Cutting yourself is stupid. Stop that shit, you’re gonna have some ugly scars.
2. Painting your face with all that black makes you look a lot worse than you think you do.
3. Ignore the other kids at school. Don’t give them a reaction – that’s what they want. Then again, breaking that girl’s jaw was a good idea. You’ll get banned from the youth club for that, btw.
4. DO NOT WASTE YOUR VALUABLE YEARS ON ROMANCE.
5. Everything’s going to change. Embrace your childhood in the most mature way you can. Do not be a dickhead.
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disagree with #1 & #2, because i’m still stuck with tiny b-cup’s & i LOVED prom! but besides those, i agree!
lily / 5148 posts
Cute list =)
I would tell myself so many times..at least my younger self anyhow lol I missed prom and I don’t regret it.
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Uhh, I’m not sure I would say anything. It’d be too dangerous. I might end up altering the future. And besides I think I’ve done pretty good so far.
magnolia / 1201 posts
@kinamorata@xanga - that’s a good one!
magnolia / 1201 posts
@MoonFaeEyryan@xanga - aw thanks… great list!
magnolia / 1201 posts
@direwolf005@xanga - oh gosh definitely agree with “3. Listen to your friends when they tell you a guy is no good for you.”!
magnolia / 1201 posts
@Spearmint - @courtneyy_rae04@xanga - thanks!
magnolia / 1201 posts
@imgoingto____FLY_x@xanga - :)
magnolia / 1201 posts
@sexncookies@xanga - that’s a great list!
magnolia / 1201 posts
@artbyrizzy@xanga - Thanks
Great list!
guest
Nice list, very full of truth!
I had to laugh at number 2. Prom definitely WASN’T that great. We all grow up thinking of prom as this magical night in which we’ll get to dance with our very own prince charming (because, you know, that’s what happens in the movies). I went with the guy of my dreams and it STILL wasn’t that great. lol And honestly, now that I look back (and definitely don’t like that guy anymore), I almost wish I went solo.
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@direwolf005@xanga - AH! Number three… truth. Most of the time, your friends are right! I can’t tell you how much I wish I had done that, AND my friends had done that when I told them the guy was a d-bag. lol
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haha ” they are only “cool” in the little bubble that is high school, not outside of it. ”
yeahhhh
guest
1) Didnt worry about my Boobs
2) I had already figured Prom would be lame…& it was.lol
The other 3 I agree with :]
orchid / 139 posts
Oh I was such a drama queen reading from my diaries…funny thing is i was only a drama queen in my head bc i didnt behave like a drama queen. Id write like ” Id die if I dont see Smallville now”. lol
And yea I made a mistake of dating someone so much older than me and acted like I knew what I was doing. After reading my diaries I realised how horrible it was…
I didnt get boobs…I didnt give myself false hope
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i like this post. i almost wish i had a younger sister to impart some wisdom upon. hahah
orchid / 149 posts
I love this. I would tell myself…
-YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. Your boyfriend clearly loved you and thought you were gorgeous. You are so pretty.
-Worry less about grades. You will be so much happier if you just focus on yourself and your happiness. Letting your need to prove yourself will only hurt you in the long run.
-Relax. Take life easier. You deserve it and you will be way happier for it.
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don’t put ur effort into popularity. in 4 years, u won’t even remember the name of the coolest kids in school
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still working on number 5…
but good list
guest
This helps a lot. I’m only 16 an i feel that it’s all completley true .
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to the younger me(without giving too much away):
1. Dedicate yourself to something you love. Dedicate and become amazing at one thing, at least. You love so many different things, but just imagine how far you go if you pay special attention to just one thing!
2. You WILL have a boyfriend before you graduate high school. For three years actually. You might be better off without him, but you’ll be missing part of who you are.
3. Don’t try to forgive him until you’re ready. You can’t handle forgiving when you’ve been betrayed so cruelly. Take the time to be mad, even if want to skip that step. Every single time.
4. Knowledge is power. Think someone’s hiding something from you? He or she probably is. Figure it out, or at least act like you have. It’ll save you some dignity.
5. Take advantage of your high school years. Do things to get ahead in life and be confident that you will(and deserve to) make it. Enjoy the fun moments. You’ll miss those years.
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my younger self probably wouldn’t listen anyways, hah!
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I love this, especially because it’s specific to you but universal to so many girls out there. It definitely put a smile on my face!
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This is really sweet, I like this post.
I wish I could stop my younger self from starting the cycle of bulimia.
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Yes, yes, yes.
I would also tell myself “no man is worth undermining your own self worth.”
This post was so beautiful. <3
guest
when i was twelve i was really concerned about my weight. it’s not a big deal, i don’t really care. actually, i still do care a little bit, only because i don’t want to look obsese at 4’9″. i would tell my little self love your body. you’re still in middle school and you’re way skinnier than most of these girls and a lot of the girls who develop ED’s would kill for your body and weight.
i would also tell myself to stop trying so hard to fit in at school. you are who you are and why do you want to change that for people who might even blow you off? your friends might not be the prettiest or coolest (as of you) but they like you for who you are.
i know i’d like to change myself into someone more confident, but i will always have my flaws. part of growing up, eh?
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Great post :]
guest
cute. :]
guest
1. Guys are douchebags. Well, most of them. Just because they tell you they love you does not by any means mean that they do. If they treat you like they don’t care, they don’t. Don’t waste your time and emotion.
2. DO NOT let anyone control your happiness. All you need is yourself and your life. “As long as you have your life, you have everything.”
3. Material objects dont mean shit. You’ll learn, once you go to Honduras. You dont need objects to be happy either.
4. Stop pushing people away. The ones that you’re afraid of getting hurt by are the ones who are always going to be there. Don’t leave the ones who treat you right, because the ones you leave them for wont. And then you really do get hurt. But they’re always there when you do. So stop.
5. Sex is not the answer. Yes, it’s amazing, but it will not cure your lonliness. It just causes a lot a lot a lot a lot of problems and drama. It can hurt people. So be choosey, don’t just give it up to anyone.
6. People suck. Get used to it. And don’t take it personally.
7. You’re in love with Trevor. Stop trying to deny it.
guest
1. Interesting idea
2. No one under 25 and probably no one under 30 should write such a post. Trust me everything you just wrote probably sound ridiculous in another 5 years.
guest
-You are more than the accessories of your outfit, the circumference of your waist, and the texture of your hair. Your meaning transcends the sexiness of your flare. -Appreciate yourself because there are not many people who care about others like you do. Stop wasting time criticizing yourself, and flourish as the good person that you are. Anyone who doesn’t see that is the one who is at a loss; not you. -Don’t hold on to something that is already gone! -Value your virginity!!
sunflower / 276 posts
I wish I could tell myself:
It’s not the end of the world if a boy doesn’t like you. In fact, it’s fine!!!!! Boys suck!!!
magnolia / 1201 posts
@Littlemisssunshine4@xanga - I’m glad it could help
magnolia / 1201 posts
@candyhearts13@xanga - Yes… that’s a great piece of advice too!
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@SUPletstake___surveys@xanga - i also disagree w/ # 1 and 2. you and SUPletstake must not know a lot of Asians.. a lot of Asians aren’t even A cups, like myself. but it’s all good. and i went to prom w/ my boyfriend and it was awesome! but #3-5 = cute!
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@SUPletstake___surveys@xanga - i also disagree w/ # 1 and 2. you and Kimberlee must not know a lot of Asians.. a lot of Asians aren’t even A cups, like myself. but it’s all good. and i went to prom w/ my boyfriend and it was awesome! but #3-5 = cute!
tulip / 13 posts
wonderful post
I was just commenting the other day “If I could have told myself when I was younger..”
a) Give yourself a break. Boys come and go. Don’t get so invested in them, especially when you KNOW they treat you bad or aren’t right for you.
b) Don’t take life so seriously (I’m sure I’ll say this to my current self in 10 years time also.. it’s tough!)
c) You are pretty. Stop worrying so much.
and d) Enjoy life
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i love you for this. <3