Many on times on Xanga, I’ve read blogs written by girls that claim “men only like hot/pretty women/girls”.
That is not true, but I believed that all my life up until high school. I changed the way I looked drastically, but what really changed was my mentality. I was always an ugly kid (even my mom said so).
I had skin problems, my eyes were uneven because one had a double eyelid and the other didn’t, and low self esteem to make it worse. My dad would always give me these bob hair cuts, and it made me look like a boy for years. My first boyfriend cheated on me with the hotter girl. I thought everyone would like me better if I was “pretty”.
By the time I had achieved the way I wanted to look which was sometime in the middle of high school, I felt like I didn’t exist. There’s so many “pretty girls” out there, and what sets anyone apart is who they are. I felt that people began to see me, but no one ever really did see me. I had people come up to me all the time in junior high asking me if I was “goth”, and that pissed me off because they just didn’t understand. Now I was just another one of those “pretty” girls, but I knew I was so much more.
Nowadays, when I speak to guys, they say they are attracted to “hot” girls, but they’d never settle with them, or take them seriously. “Hot” girls are just seen as objects in men’s eyes. It’s a very superficial way to judge someone, and unrealistic. I have guys call me “hot” quite often, but I dislike it because they’ll never see me for who I am as if I’m just an image or even just a thing. I always see these not so hot, but just average girls end up with the good guys because they seem like the safer choice, the better choice to bring home to mom.
So next time you think “men only like hot girls”, think again. The grass is never greener on the other side.
No one takes me seriously because I’m ”pretty”, and on the inside, I’m still that ugly kid with low self esteem. I feel fucked up on the inside because though my outsides have changed, the way I feel about myself hasn’t, but my mom was right, my eyes evened out as I grew up.