Fighting the PMS Monster: I Love Alesse  

Alesse = birth control pill, for those who don't know. Right now I'm on about the third day of my period.

Six months ago, this would have meant that I'd be currently strapped to my bed with an icepack on my head and a hot cloth on my stomach, writing long rants about how much I hate life. (That, or looking up dead baby jokes. They always brighten my mood.)

Six months ago, this would have meant that I'd be infused with a concoction of Ibuprofen and chocolate, and perhaps a dash of the ever-craved pickles I hold so dear.

And six months ago, this would have meant that I most certainly would not be allowed out during the day - for fear of being provoked to morph into my alter-ego, whom we shall call "Imgonnakillyou Girl."


Imgonnakillyou Girl
If spotted, do not make any sudden movements or sounds. Remain calm. Slowly move in the direction of the nearest exit or tranquilizing dart gun.

But that's no longer the case.

Since I've been on Alesse 28, my periods have gotten lighter and shorter (now lasting more along the lines of 5 days rather than 7).

I no longer have insanely painful cramps past the first two days - and even those cramps are mild in comparison to what I've experienced.

I haven't taken a single Advil for six months (well, okay, barring the one time I swallowed like 8 because I was super sick, but that's a different story... and I threw all those up anyway).

And Imgonnakillyou Girl no longer shows herself - not even for a short rampage. Instead, I can be my normal super sexy self, even when some haikus ehit particularly close to home. And while I still manage to look pretty insane (as evidenced by the photo below), it's definitely a sexy insane.


Sexy Insane Me

So, I just wanted to send out a big THANK YOU to all the people who worked on developing the birth control pill. You are all my heroes. If I were Mormon, I'd marry you all (and your spouses too).

Do you have really bad periods?  Have you tried or would you consider trying birth control?  Any other tips on handling the pain?