While browsing through Yahoo questions I came across a person who was troubled by his inferiority to his sister and brother because he felt he lacked any good looks in comparison to them. I wanted to find this boy and hug him. No, not because I’m creepy, but because I know all too well how he’s feeling.
Growing up I definitely felt my brother and sister hogged the gene pool and took all the good looks. It was only confirmed to me (in my head) that this was true when both went into modeling and were successful in it (my brother even does the occasional TV show). Everywhere I went with my sister, people would stop in their tracks and stare and I had only obtained friends in middle school because the entire cheerleading team practically had my brother’s name scribbled in their notebooks. I look so different from my siblings that people usually think I’m dating my brother when we’re out together and that I’m my sister’s “other friend”; the one she goes out with to make herself look better (as if she needs it).
My brother and sister are very modest so they never rubbed it in my face and actually complimented me; my sister tells me in e-mails how she brags about me right after I tell her how every girl at my fashion school would probably cut a limb off to look like her. But even so, it took many years for me to realize I had great qualities as well. Sure I couldn’t put modeling and acting on my resume, but there were a slew of other things I was good at and that made me a good person. I finally realized the good points I had instead of comparing myself to my brother and sister, and it made us all get along much better.
Have you ever felt inferior to your siblings? How did you deal with it?
guest
Never felt inferior to my siblings before…I guess it’s because I know them well..their bad traits that I don’t see them as better than me…and my brothers and I are closely similar in looks…so..if they’re good looking..I’d say I am too…
But if I were to feel inferior to them..looks wise…I’d say to myself, at least I got the brains…
guest
No, I feel confident about myself. Usually, they’re the ones picking on me because of what I “got”. I understand where they’re coming from, but sometimes, it’s just absurd. Feel confident about yourself and most importantly, feel good.
guest
I feel stupid and slow, and that I lack common sense compared to my sibling.
guest
sunflower / 451 posts
I feel like my brother and sister are a lot smarter than me. It somehow doesn’t matter that I am writing music for two albums and work with artists from all over the world. Both of them can always prove me wrong (my brother especially) and it gets old. My brother is also way better in social situations than I am. He knows everyone, I’m kind of shy. I try to remind myself that neither of them could do what I do and I have my own good qualities while trying to appreciate theirs. But it does get a little hard to deal with at times.
orchid / 209 posts
My family likes my brother more, like way more
guest
I’m the ugly duckling and the black sheep of the family. Everyone else is beautiful and I’m just….not.
guest
I have a really gorgeous sister and I would often get the ‘What happened to YOU?!” looks. I used to get really offended but then just like you, I started realizing I have some good qualities myself. Besides, I’ve been told numerous times that I have the upper hand personality-wise.
orchid / 121 posts
I feel like I’m pretty in a very thin, waify, underfed way (which is annoying because I order the biggest plates eating out with friends…) but my little sister is absolutely gorgeous. She has lips from Angelina Jolie, and somewhere she got C cups (I’ve got A’s! talk about UNFAIR) and beautiful perfect dark hair and clear skin, where I have auburn hair that’s fine but a TON of it’s there, freckles, a small amount of breakouts I’ve had to deal with, and an ability to fit into my little brother’s 9-year-old suit jacket he grew out of because he’s 14.
but I’m not really jealous of her. it’s weird. like, I think she’s prettier than me, but I can’t be jealous of her because she’s my little sister. if anything, I’m so proud of her! And I try to take her shopping and get her to buy clothes that accentuate her figure because she just doesn’t care/doesn’t realize yet, she’s only 17. When we walk together, people say our faces look exactly alike (untrue) and we have the same mannerisms, but next to my family I look like a cousin, while people have actually walked up to my brother and sister before and started speaking Spanish to them.
I think it’s my job in life to build up siblings and especially empower the women in life any way I can, not tear them down and be jealous of them!
guest
All the tiime. But it’s not really about looks. They both kind of got the brains. I’m not an idiot, but my sister is a “gifted kid” and my brother is a math/science brainiac. I just get by in academia, and it took until I got to college for people not to ask me, “Oh! Brittney’s sister?” Granted I’m sure my brother got that too, but it was always Brittney, most likely never me. And so, the way I dealt with it, is I went away for college. Ha, ha.
My siblings and I never really put too much stock in looks.. my sister makes fun of my big boobs sometimes, but that aside.. My brother looks a lot different than my sister and me, and in middle school girls thought I was his girlfriend instead of his sister. It’s so weird, he’s blonde, and the rest of us are dark brunettes. And my sister has giant feet. I think that about covers the three of us.
guest
I’ve felt inferior to my younger sister because she’s five inches taller than me and physically superior in almost every way. She’s always complimented for being adorable, and she’s such a social butterfly. I am the ugly tag-along in comparison. I haven’t quite figured out how to deal with it yet.
guest
I’m who I am & it doesn’t bother me what my siblings look like. My sister might be prettier or look older than me but I’m happy with how I am.. I’ve got a great boyfriend who loves me for me as well. What more can I ask for?
PS. Eva Longoria used to think of herself as the ugly duckling ’cause her 3 sisters had fair skin & hair & she was the sole “dark” one but look where she’s now.
daisy / 742 posts
I feel inferior to my entire family. Although I’d say I have the brains, everyone would agree that I’m the worst looking (not like they’d say something like that, but it’s true). However, people do compliment me and tell me that I’m “pretty” or “cute”, because I think it has to do more with how you carry yourself and what kind of attitude you exude.
I’ve learned that if you weren’t born with the perfect body or facial features, it doesn’t mean that you’re ugly. I used to be really shy and depressed on how much my life sucked because of my looks, but once I started to find my own fashion style and the right make up to accentuate my features, I started receiving a ton of compliments. Also, since I started to expand my social network, I’ve gained a lot more confidence and EVEN MORE compliments poured in.
With the improvement of my overall look, people wanted to see me for who I was inside too. They find that I’m very likeable and easy going and that adds on to my confidence level.
So, I think that if you weren’t born with good looks, you can definitely make up for it with other qualities. Also, they say that “confidence is sexy”, and I’m a firm believer in that saying =D.
guest
I’m white (and extremely pale); my sister’s Haitian.
Also, she’s about a foot shorter than me!
I do envy her style sometimes, and she is beautiful, but it would be ridiculous for me to compare myself to her because we’re so different!
guest
I pretty much look exactly like my siblings. People confuse me and my sister (sometimes thinking we’re the same person-even though she is a lot taller than me), and by some freak accident of nature, my brother got the same exact genes as I did…except he got a Y chromosome instead of the extra X. He is the boy version of me.
So, I haven’t really felt inferior to them, and they to me. We are all equals.